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Light, Love, Hope

Light in the Darkness Surrounded by Love with Hope for those in need.

Shirley

About Shirley

https://lightlovehope.com

Shirley is the proud mother of two beautiful young ladies. She enjoys spending time with them on their ranch in the deep South with their three paint horses. Always looking for an adventure, she looks forward to hikes in the mountains chasing waterfalls, or scouring the coast for beautiful lighthouses! Shirley writes to encourage others and often times shares things that motivate and inspire her. She believes in living life to the fullest because no one is promised the gift of another day. Join her as we honor our bodies, minds, hearts, souls, and our Almighty Creator, God above!

Posts by Shirley :

Depression and Suicidal Thoughts

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No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.

~Robin Williams in the movie Dead Poet’s Society

This week the world lost a very valuable actor, Robin Williams.  He was known for some serious roles that he played such as in the movie Dead Poet’s Society, but he was more known to my family for his role in Mrs. Doubtfire and for all of the laughter he supplied to us through the years.  My daughters both grew up watching this movie repeatedly.  We have watched it so many times that we can all recite lines from the movie.  He provided humor right when it was needed in the way that only Robin Williams could, yet he touched on some very serious subject matters in this movie as well.

Robin Williams seemed to be America’s funny man.  He was usually all smiles for the camera and had a joke or two readily available to give you a big ole belly laugh.   The vast majority of us did not realize that Mr. Williams suffered for years with depression.  I have heard a lot within the past week of how not only did Mr. Williams suffer from depression, but he was also Bi-Polar which of course has manic and mania tendencies.   All I know is that no one truly knows what goes on behind someone’s smile.  This is proof right here!

Many fans around the world are shocked and are in disbelief over Mr. Williams taking his own life.  Looking in the windows of his life, it would appear that Mr. Williams had it all:  Fortune, Family, & Fame.  However, there were things going on inside of Mr. Williams that tormented him.  He had his own personal demons that no one can ever fully understand unless they’ve been right where Mr. Williams was the day he took his own life.  No one could have ever imagined that Mr. Williams had depression and suicidal thoughts going on behind that smile of his and all of his jokes.

In high school we lost two of our classmates to suicide.  I remember hearing the news that my friend had hung himself and how he was clinging to life with the aid of the ventilator.  I was unable to visit him in the hospital, and to be honest, I don’t know how I would have handled seeing him in that shape.  I just prayed for him and cried my eyes out the next morning when it was announced on the school intercom that he had passed away.  I remember attending his funeral with tears falling like rain.  I remember my grandmother also grabbing me at the funeral telling me to pull myself together.  This shocked me to be told at a moment like this to pull myself together … at a funeral … under the circumstances with the way he died.  It felt like I was not allowed to grieve for my friend and then immediately guilt set in for not being able to control my emotions.

We lost another classmate a year or so later the same exact way.  It left us all asking why something like this had to happen and how someone could take their own life.

Then depression and suicide touched my family and brought us all to our knees.   This was something that always happened to other people.  We always “heard” of this but it was always “over there” in someone else’s family … surely not ours!  But, there it was, dropped right in our laps when the world crumbled around us that hot July day back in 2001.  It doesn’t seem that long ago, really, and there are times when it seems like just yesterday when all of the feelings and emotions come rushing in.  The day my sister took her own life.  She died by her own hands.  She committed an act that we never would have ever thought she would have done.  She drew her last breath on this side of Heaven, and we knew that we would never be the same again.  When she died, she took a part of us with her.   She was my only sibling, my older sister that I looked up to.   And now, I’m all alone in this world without my sister, my best friend.

It is so hard to understand how a person could do this, and yet it happens far more than we can even begin to imagine.  People get so down in life with different things troubling them.   They are in so much emotional pain with things coming at them from every angle.  When their problems pile up, they begin to feel as if the only way to end the pain that they feel is to end their life.  It’s tragic when it gets to this point.   A lot of people say, “If only they would have reached out for help …” and question why such a strong person would succumb to weakness to this extent … you and I will never understand unless or until we’ve been right where they were the moment they made the decision to end their lives.   I pray you and I never know how it feels.  I pray that we never go through our own personal hell to this extent to where we feel the only way out, the only way to make this better for us and our loved ones is to take matters into our own hands.

Please … hear me now, whatever you may be feeling reading this or whatever you may be going through in life, please … I beg you, as a survivor of the aftermath of suicide, please know that help is available.  If you could share how you’re feeling with a trusted friend or family member, they will get you the help that you need.  Help is also available through the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255) where you will be connected to a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area.  This service is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

We talk a lot on this site about choosing joy and staying positive.  We try to change our negative way of thinking to find more positives and things to be thankful for.  We ask that you focus on things that bring you joy and happiness instead of things that threaten to pull you down.  We ask that you give thanks and recognize how blessed you are in this life.  We do this for a reason.  It isn’t so that we can all live in a bubble of make-believe and pretend, ignoring problems in our lives.  No.  It is because there ARE so many problems and things that trouble us in this world that we ask you to shift your focus if you are able to do so.  We realize that if you are in the pit of depression, this is something that you simply cannot do very easily, if at all.   In times like these, we hope that you will speak with a trusted friend or family member and that you will also seek professional help.  Please know that there is NO SHAME in reaching out for help. I only wish more people would do so.  Oh how I wish my sister had reached out that day instead of taking matters into her own hands.

There is such a stigma attached to mental illness and depression.  A lot of times, people do not want to share what they are going through for fear of being judged or looked down upon.  Please know that it takes a lot of courage to speak up and to tell someone.  It takes a lot to reach out for help, but please … I beg of you, if you ever get to this place, please reach out to someone!

Over the years I have had several friends that did reach out to me, and I am thankful that they did because I was able to take them to the emergency room at a local hospital for them to get the help that they needed.  I have personally taken two people in my vehicle to the emergency room when they have called me for help.  It was not easy dealing with this type of a situation, but these people reached out to me in their time of need, and I immediately rushed to their side.  I spoke with them at length, and then we made the decision together to go to the emergency room. Thankfully these friends were willing and did not put up a fight at all.  They recognized the need for help and were literally crying out for it.  And so, they were taken to the emergency room where they were admitted into a program to receive the help that they needed in the form of counseling and medication.  They are doing well today, thankfully.

I have had two others friends that dealt with suicidal thoughts as well.  One was determined no matter what we said to end it all, but thankfully her attempts failed.  She ended up in the psychiatric ward on lock down against her will the last time, and I think that was what it took for her outlook to change.  She has not attempted since, to my knowledge.

The other friend that I spoke of worked in the medical field.  He dealt with cases where children were involved, and the cases did not always have the desired outcome.  After losing a precious little girl that he had gotten close to with her and her family, he went into a deep depression and attempted suicide himself.  He survived and lived to tell about it.  He sought treatment and is in a better place today as well.

Each of the individuals mentioned above were struggling with things inside of themselves that could not be remedied by a simple attitude adjustment.  No amount of positive thinking was going to change their view on life at that moment in time.  No amount of anyone saying to “pull yourself up by your boot straps” would help either, instead, often times it would add insult to injury with someone saying such things.   We realize that depression, mental illness, and suicidal thoughts is a very serious matter, and that is why we beg of you … please reach out, please talk to a trusted friend or loved one.

Here on this site we want you to know that you’re not alone in your struggles.  We want to encourage you in every possible way, and we want you to know that you are a precious child of God.   We want to offer support to you and give you our love.  We want you to cling to hope and put your faith in God to see you through.  Every one of us will go through hard times in this life.  We are not sure why that is, but perhaps it is so that we can show compassion for our fellow man.  Perhaps going through our own struggles allows us the ability to empathize with others.  Perhaps it enables us to show more love and kindness.

If you or some one you love is in need of assistance, please call the Suicide Hotlines.  Help is available, and there are numbers listed by state.  By clicking here, you will be taken to the Suicide Hotline page with states listed in alphabetical order for your convenience and ease.

Help is available.   Hold on a little longer.  Know you are loved by your friends here at Light Love Hope.

For I know

Focusing On Our Blessings

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Today we are calling you to take action on this Tuesday!  Yesterday we pointed out various different ways that we are so very blessed in this life.  Today I would like you to participate in a little activity. I hope you will join me as we are going to be focusing on our blessings!

Whether you do so in the comment section, in your email to another family member or friend, or if you write it on Facebook, I would like to challenge you to list several things that you are thankful for.   You don’t necessarily have to write them down, but for me, it helps to do so instead of leaving those thoughts in my head.  If I write them down and see them in black and white in front of me, it seems to possess more power.

For the next week, I would like you to focus on these and other things on your list that bring you joy, love, and happiness.  I am asking you to give thanks and to be grateful for the gifts you have been given in this life.  Count your blessings not your troubles or sorrows.  Focus intentionally on things that you truly need to praise God for, and then start doing it!!  That is the key!

Are you ready to accept this challenge?

I am thankful for:

  • My beautiful children that God has given to me.  They are my miracles from above, and I just thank God from the very bottom of my heart for trusting me to care for these precious little ones.  He gave them to me, and my soul danced with delight the day I found out I was pregnant.   I was so in love with you, and my heart leaped with joy and excitement every time I would feel you move and kick inside of me.  There are no words to adequately describe how I felt when my baby girls were placed in my arms for the first time.  Tears of joy filled my eyes and spilled out down my cheek as I looked into your angelic faces.  I counted ten perfect little fingers and ten perfect little toes.  I thank God for my babies.  They are now 17 years old and nine years old at the time of this writing, and my heart cherishes and treasures each and every moment that I have been given with them.   They are the reason I am on this earth.  They are my purpose, and they are my life!  I thank God for my two miracles from above!
  • My parents who gave me the best that they possibly could growing up.  We were not rich by any stretch of the imagination.  What we lacked in money and in material things, we were overflowing with in love, compassion, and care for one another.  My parents raised me with good morals and values.  They taught me to be a responsible and respectable young lady, to be a woman of great character and integrity.  I am thankful for my parents loving me in the good times as well as the bad and for being my rock through the troubled times in my life.  Things haven’t always been easy, but we had each other through it all.  My heart is eternally grateful, and I thank God above for my parents.
  • My husband who I met when we were teenagers.  Although too shy to really connect back then, we thought of each other through the years and destiny brought us back together many years later.  We reconnected and rekindled the spark inside of our hearts for each other.  Although we have struggled through the years as most marriages do, we have realized that the love that we have is something worth fighting for.  We share what most people search their whole lives for and rarely ever find.  It has not always been easy, but it has always been worth it.  It is a love that I will fight for and do everything within my power to ensure lasts.  As God as my witness, I will not rest until I have exhausted every measure to ensure that this man knows how much I love him.   I thank God for putting us back together.
  • My friends.  Oh, the Lord has richly blessed me with friends who are more like family.  They truly are the family that I have chosen for myself.   You are born with family, and then you meet people in this life that you connect with on such a deep level.  They, then, become your family of choice.   I love each and every one of them with a love so deep and so powerful, and I thank God for placing these beautiful souls in my life.   Some friends I have had for 20 years, and I know that they will be by my side no matter what.  We may not always see eye to eye, and there may be things that threaten to pull us apart from time to time.  However, we always come back together.  That is what true friendship is all about.   I thank God that I have a hand full of people in this life that I know are my true friends and love me completely just as I love them.  They are my brothers and sisters of the heart.

This list is just something that came to me right off the top of my head as my fingers floated over the keyboard and words flowed from me onto the post that you’re now reading.   I have many, many blessings in this life.  I am so very thankful to God for all that He has done for me and my family and friends.    He is so good, ladies and gentlemen!  He is so good to us.  He blesses us and continues to pour out His blessings in our lives.  He is worthy to be praised.

Look around you as you start to write your list.  You don’t have to capture everything today.  Just think of a few things that easily come to your mind.  Be sure to thank God for these gifts in your life.

May God continue to pour out His blessings on your life.

Always & Forever,

Shirley

Focusing On Our Blessings

We Are Blessed

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We all have struggles and trials in this life, and I am sure that there have been times when every one of us has uttered some version of the following saying:

I know that God will not give me more than I can bear.  I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.

There may be times when you feel pushed to your limit.  You may feel like you’re hanging on by a thread even.  When you’re at your wits end and are not sure how much more you can take, know that God will not give you more than you can bear.  He won’t.

Also, know this.  God will be with you every step of the way, even carrying you when He needs to in order for you to make it through.

With everything that you’ve been through, know that there is someone else in the world that has it worse than you do.   When we stop to consider just how blessed we truly are, our problems begin to lose their grip on us.  The problems may still be there, but it helps to change your way of thinking about them.  Instead of focusing on the negatives of your situation, try to think of a positive in the situation.  I promise you, as bad as you think your problems are, someone somewhere else in the world has it a lot worse.

It takes a lot of effort, but when you find yourself starting to dwell on your problems, try changing your focus to something a little more positive instead.  Easier said than done, but trust me.  You have so many blessings in your life.  You have so many things to be thankful for!

You are blessed!

I am blessed!

We are blessed!

We are so blessed in this lifetime! Why, then, do we focus only on the negatives? Why do we give them so much power over our lives?  Let’s do something about that, shall we?

When your eyes open in the morning, immediately start your day with a positive thought and a word of praise.

Oh thank you, God!  Thank you for waking me up this morning!  Thank you for the gift of another day!  Thank you for another opportunity to live my life to the fullest.

It matters how you start your day!   If you wake up and begin with negative thoughts before your eyes ever open, you won’t have as good of a day as you would if you begin your day with words of thankfulness and praise.

When you wake up, take a deep breath in and thank God for waking you up with the morning light.  Thank Him for allowing you to be with your loved ones another day.  Some people didn’t get that extra day that you’ve been given.

When your feet hit the floor, thank Him that you can get out of bed in the mornings.  Thank Him that you had a bed to sleep in last night and covers to warm you.  Some people do not have this luxury.

When you walk to the bathroom to get a shower, thank God that you’re able to walk!  Thank God that you’re able to do for yourself.  Others have to depend on people to bathe them as they are unable to do that for themselves.  Think of how blessed you are, and say a special prayer for all of those that are going through this and for the precious caregivers.   Neither the patient nor the caregiver have an easy road ahead of them that day, yet here you stand under the warmth of the shower.

Don’t give into the temptation of a complaining spirit.  You have much to be thankful for!

When you sit down to have your breakfast and drink your coffee, thank God for the food!   Some do not have anything to eat at all.   (Be sure to thank God for your food before you begin your meal.  I always notice when people don’t do this and just start eating or stare at us when we get ready to bow our heads to say the blessing before we eat.  Be thankful in all things … even for the food that you’re about to receive!)

Make time to read your bible or a daily devotional and pray before starting your day.  I have heard people that say they just don’t have time for this.  I say that you DO … you don’t have to get down on your knees every single time to pray.  You can pray while you’re in the shower, having breakfast, or driving down the road going to work or school.  You CAN find time.  If your mind can wander to all of the negatives, you have time to gain control of your thoughts and go to God in prayer.  That is when you need to re-focus your attention any way instead of remaining in a negative state of mind.  You DO have time to pray!  As far as not having time to read your bible or a daily devotional, that isn’t true either.  There are some devotionals that don’t require a lot of time, yet their messages are powerful and will have you thinking on them all day.  My husband reads Joel Osteen’s daily devotional every morning.  I am partial to Joyce Meyer’s daily devotional.  Jesus Calling by Sarah Young is also a very powerful daily devotional.   They do not require a lot of time, yet they leave such an impact!  Try it!

We are blessed in this life.  If we would just take a moment or two to redirect our thoughts, it will make a difference in how our day goes!  It has been proven!

Will you try it?  Will you make an effort to be more positive and to start your day in a more positive manner?

Will you count your blessings instead of focusing on your troubles?

We Are Blessed

Vent To God

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When you need to “vent” to someone, when things are troubling you and you feel like you just “have” to get them out, who do you turn to?

In the past, I have gone to friends or family members when I needed to talk.  This has helped, especially when the person, like my daddy, listens, comforts, and loves.  When others start to condemn or criticize, that is when it starts to get a little touchy.  Often times you just need someone to “listen.”   While I don’t expect everyone to sit quietly and take in all I’m saying without uttering a word, I would like the words to be respectful and loving that they speak to me, especially in my time of need.  If I have trusted them enough to talk to them about what is bothering me, surely they could have some compassion and carefully select the words they speak back to my troubled or broken heart.   And … surely what I say would be kept in the strictest of confidence when taken to a trusted friend.

That is how it is supposed to work, but unfortunately, I have learned a very valuable lesson the hard way just recently when I have taken my broken heart and placed it gently in the hands of friends.  I shared things that really were hurting me and that threatened my family.  I spoke openly about those things as a way to cleanse my soul by not internalizing any more.  I was letting it all flow freely from me because I just had to get it out.

What happened next wasn’t pretty.   I later discovered, by one friend’s admission, that she had talked privately with another of my friends.  The two were almost comparing notes on what I had told them, and when one didn’t know one piece of information, the other offered it up to them.   My friend admitted her part in this, even sending me the private messages shared between her and my other friend.   I read through all of the messages almost in disbelief initially.  Then, there were some proud moments as I read how each friend cared so much about me and really loved me.  I know they were concerned for me with what had just taken place and threatened my family.   I could see that in their words, but the more I read, the more vicious some of the messages appeared to be … and some times they were aimed at my beloved … while other times they were aimed right at me.

Now that it was finally out in the open, both friends have apologized to me … but it still hurts and makes me unable to fully trust again with intimate details of my life.  Maybe at some point I will get past this and be able to share again, but for now, I will have to return to internalizing a lot of things.

Or will I?

It has dawned on me that when I have felt and currently feel that I have no one to talk to … why am I not turning to God?  It hit me like a ton of bricks.   He is the One True Friend we always have, and He loves us unconditionally.   Why, then, do I trust others to go to them instead of trusting GOD by taking all of my worries, concerns, fears, doubts, and hurts to HIM?

Think about it for a moment.  Why not take ALL of your worries, cares, and concerns to Him?   The bible says to cast ALL of our cares on Him, yet so many times we hold them in, we fret and are consumed with anxiety over things that we feel we are facing alone.  The truth is that if we’d carry ALL of our problems to God as He has asked us to, we wouldn’t feel so alone.   We wouldn’t have to try to solve all of the world’s problems because we do not possess the power to do so.  Some times we can’t even help ourselves with OUR problems.  But I know One who can … God!

I know that a friend’s voice is clearly heard.   If we call them on the phone, write a message to them, or see them face to face, we can clearly hear their tone of voice to know how they are saying it or as we’ve gotten to know them, we can pick up their “tone” even in written words.   We get feedback from them instantaneously.   We hear what they think and how they feel about the situation.  Often times they hold nothing back, even when they should due to the impact it has on our hearts and souls.   Maybe that is the attraction, the draw to sharing all with a friend.  We can hear them in return.

Do you feel that the silence is deafening?  When we take our problems to the Lord, do we feel that we get nothing but silence in return?   Consider this.  We can’t hear God’s voice whispering if we have so many distractions and don’t still our minds long enough to consider what He may be saying back to us in return.   Yes, we talk to God … but consider that He wants to speak to US, too!  And even if we don’t hear that still small voice right away, we begin to see His hands at work in our lives.   He knows what is going on with us any way, but He wants us to come to Him.  He wants to hear it all – the good, the bad, and the ugly.  He wants us to trust Him.

I can guarantee you that God won’t go behind your back to talk about you.  I can guarantee you that God won’t hold a grudge against the person or situation that caused you great pain either.   That is yet another problem when you take things to friends or family members.  When you’re hurting in the moment and you need a way to release it by talking about it, once it has been spoken and leaves your body, heart, and mind … you are able to regain your composure and work things out even better than before in your life.   Yet, the friend or family member you carried your concerns to will NOT be so quick to release the feelings they have about the troubles you shared with them.  If you were having problems with your husband, child, or in-laws, the friend that you went to will not be so quick to release their feelings about the situation.  Long after you have moved on from that situation and things are better between you and the person, the one you went to will continue to hold on to the problem and will often times bring it back up to you, as if you needed a reminder.

I can assure you that God forgives you if you’ve wronged someone, and I can assure you that God forgives others that wrong YOU, too, if they ask.  Yes, the one you initially had problems with where you needed someone to talk to about what was going on … and yes, even the one that talked behind your back with your other friend about your problems.  If they ask for forgiveness and truly mean it with their whole hearts, God will forgive them, too.

We are all children of God, and He loves each and every one of us with the same unconditional love.   It doesn’t matter what we’ve done, while it may break His heart to see it, I believe He will still forgive us of our wrongdoings if we ask with a sincere heart and repent from our sins so we don’t do these things again.  Repent means to ask forgiveness and then turn from our sins!   If you took part in something that hurt someone else and you asked for forgiveness from them, be sure that you also ask God for forgiveness for your part in all of this.  If you ask with a sincere heart, you will be forgiven.  Then don’t allow yourself to get back into that situation again.  Don’t betray a friend by talking about what they shared with you with someone else.  I can assure you, God will never do that to you.

My lesson learned the hard way this week:  when you need to vent … vent to God, instead.

 

Words

Fill

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With an empty feeling down deep inside, we sit and stare out into space.  Since you left us, it’s been so hard to put the pieces back together.  We try, but they don’t seem to fit right any more.  It’s as if we’re trying to put square pieces into a round hole.  It just doesn’t work.

When once we had such joy in our souls and the light shined brightly from the internal flame, now it is as if someone walked right up to us and blew it out just like you would the candles on a birthday cake.

Our hearts cry out for you.   Our whispered prayers carry your name from our lips across the blue skies extending up above the clouds and into Heaven’s gates straight to the foot of Jesus.   He listens attentively with this arms stretched out wide and loving kindness in every fiber of His being.  He comes to us and wraps us securely in His love.   He comforts as only He can and provides strength to go on.

If your heart is empty, let our Heavenly Father fill you with peace that surpasses all understanding as He pours His unconditional love over you.  Allow him to begin to mend your broken heart.

Pretty Place1

~This piece was written with the prompt word of FILL in mind for this edition of Five Minute Friday over at Kate’s virtual house.~

 

 

National Lighthouse Day

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Today is National Lighthouse Day!  I bet you didn’t even know there was such a thing, did you?   It’s true as the United States Senate passed an unanimous resolution which declares August 7th as National Lighthouse and Lighthouse Preservation Day.  To read more about this, please see this article at the Lighthouse Digest.

As you might have gathered from the pictures that you see on our site, we LOVE lighthouses!   When I see a lighthouse, my mind drifts back for a moment on what it must have been like for the sailors in the mist of a storm brewing.  I am sure they were afraid at times and wondered how they would make it safely through the storm.    If it was a particularly foggy morning, I imagine they were filled with anxiety due to being unable to see through it.   I imagine how they might have been scrambling around on board preparing “just in case” when what did they see flash before them?   A beacon of light from the mighty tower that stood in the distance.  This light would guide them to safety!   I imagine that cheers from the crew could be heard a mile away!

I just recently told one of my friends that I would like to visit every single remaining lighthouse in the United States!   While I don’t like to call it this, this is an item on my “bucket list.”    In the meantime, though, I will settle with visiting the ones in South Carolina that I have had the pleasure of seeing in person.

One of my favorite lighthouses in South Carolina is the Morris Island Lighthouse, which is the picture that comes up on our posts on our Facebook page when we haven’t included a picture in the post for that day.   There should also be pictures in our gallery on this site which include this beautiful structure.   Since I love this lighthouse so much, I won’t make you look far.  I’ll gladly share them with you here!  LightLoveHopeCover

My family and I like to go to the very end of Folly Beach, as far as you can drive, and then park our car to set out on a little hike.  At the very end of this path, you will see the beauty that is the Morris Island Lighthouse.

 

Morris Island Lighthouse

Once we took a boat ride over to the island to get a closer look at the lighthouse.  It is surrounded by water, so it is not possible to walk right up to the lighthouse.

Morris Island Lighthouse1

 

It was fun taking pictures of it where it looked like we were either holding the lighthouse in our hands or hugging the lighthouse.  Good times!   The shells on the island were beautiful as not too many people go there, so you don’t have to worry about shells getting trampled on.  If you like hunting for treasures (shells), then going over to this island is a “must.”

Morris Island Lighthouse2

When a friend of the family visited in April of this year, I took him over to Hunting Island to see the massive black and white lighthouse near the Beaufort area.

Hunting Island Lighthouse1

While the structure has been moved inland, you can climb to the very top of this lighthouse and look through the telescope which will have a mark to show you where the lighthouse originally stood on the shore.  While it was quite a hike to get to the top of the lighthouse, the view was absolutely gorgeous up there!Hunting Island Lighthouse through telescope

While my friend was in town, we also visited the Sullivan’s Island Lighthouse which is in the Charleston area.  Sullivan’s Island is a quiet little town with a few restaurants on the main strip as you come into town.  We had to ask the locals where this lighthouse was, as we could not figure out how to get to it.  They were nice enough to tell us as we chowed down on some good food and talked about the local attractions the area had to offer.   Then, we put their directions to good use and set off to find the lighthouse!

Sullivan's Island Lighthouse1

It is inland now also with a chain link fence around it, so, much to our disappointment, it was not possible to tour.

Sullivan's Island Lighthouse

My husband and I took a trip recently to Hilton Head, and while we’ve been there before many years ago, I did not remember the lighthouse there.  I am not sure how I could have missed it, but there Is a beautiful red and white lighthouse at Harbortown.

Hilton Head Lighthouse

We climbed to the top, although there were not as many steps in this one since it is a smaller structure, to take a look at the boats in the marina.

View From Hilton Head Lighthouse

While we were in Hilton Head, we made sure to check out an old lighthouse that is a skeleton structure.  It took a bit to get to this lighthouse as it is now in a gated community!   We set out on a mission to find it, and thankfully, the guard let us through to view that which we set our sights on that day!

Skeleton Lighthouse In Hilton Head

There are several more lighthouses in South Carolina that we have yet to see, but they are on our “to do” list!   We hope to make it to those lighthouses by the end of the year!  I can hardly wait!  Rest assured, I will most certainly have my camera in hand when we visit, too!

Just as I told of how I imagined the sailors at the beginning of this post during the mist of a storm brewing, I’d like to share a bible verse with you and a portion of a song to tie this all together.

Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, “I am the light of the world.  If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness because you will have the light that leads to life.

John 8:12 NLT

And now the song:

There’s a lighthouse on the hillside
That overlooks life’s sea
When I’m tossed it sends out a light
That I might see
And the light that shines in darkness now
Will safely lead us o’er
If it wasn’t for the lighthouse
My ship would be no more

(SPOKEN)
It seems that every one about us says,
“Tear that old lighthouse down.
The big ships just don’t pass this way anymore,
so there’s no use in standin’ round.”
Then my mind goes back to that one dark, stormy night,
when just in time I saw the light.
Yes, it was the light from that old lighthouse,
that stands up there on the hill.

And I thank God for the lighthouse
I owe my life to Him
Jesus is the lighthouse
And from the rocks of sin
He has shown a light around me
That I might clearly see
If it wasn’t for the lighthouse
Tell me where would this ship be

I thank God for the lighthouse
I owe my life to Him
Jesus is the lighthouse
And from the rocks of sin
He has shown a light around me
That I might clearly see
If it wasn’t for the lighthouse
Tell me where would this ship be

 

Happy National Lighthouse Day to you from all of us here at Light Love Hope!

 

lightlovehope button

Be Present and Available

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July and August are months that my friend and I struggle to get through every year. You see, I lost my sister, Pamela, on July 9th, 2001. She died a very tragic death, one that still affects our family to this very day. My friend lost his mother a few years later on July 13, 2004. He was his mother’s primary caregiver and was there with her until the very end. The final moments will remain with my friend forever. And then, a little over a year ago, my friend lost his sister, Julia.

We have tried to go on with our lives, but there is a part of us that our loved ones took with them when they left this earth. We have been forever changed and have been impacted by these precious people that have gone too soon.

What do you say when someone is hurting? How do you comfort them in their time of need? How do you reassure them that everything is going to be okay when you have no way to ensure that it will now that their loved ones have passed away?

I find myself at a loss for words each and every year. I don’t want to be so consumed in my grief that I am not “there” for my friend in what they are going through. If my friend needs me, I want to be there for them. I think the hardest part for me is that I want to “do” something to relieve their pain, and there isn’t a single thing in the world that I can do to accomplish this. It’s unobtainable because they do hurt and their pain is real. There truly is nothing that I can say that will be of any comfort to them, and there isn’t anything I can physically do for them to provide peace and understanding. There’s no gift that I could send that will wipe away their tears.

Through the years, the only thing I have found that I can do is pray for them. I know they’re struggling, whether they say the words or not. My heart feels a special connection to their heart, and when they hurt, I hurt, too. It’s as simple as that. So, I pray. I ask God to provide peace and comfort as only He can. When I’m not physically able to wrap my arms around them due to the distance that we live apart, I ask God to wrap His loving arms around my friend, to draw him close and allow my friend to rest his weary head on God’s shoulder for a little while. I ask for peace to come over my friend, peace that could only be provided by our Heavenly Father. I ask for reassurance that my friend is never truly alone, even if he may feel that way at the moment.

I send my thoughts out into the universe, and I allow my heart to speak to my friend’s heart across the miles. That soft whisper during the evening, that’s my heart calling to his to reassure that he is not alone. He is always in my thoughts and in my heart. Miles may separate us, but hearts that truly care are always near.

The only gift I can think to give at a time like this is to let my friend know that I’m present and available should they need to talk about their loved ones or their feelings at this time. I want my friend to know that I’m always here for them no matter what but especially even more so at this time. On their “tender days” I may not call attention to it by announcing that I know what day it is, but I’m present and available, even if it’s just by sending a silly little smiley face in a blank message. That’s me acknowledging them and letting them know that I’m here.

I know my friend is struggling this week, especially. He normally carries the We Care Wednesday series. Today, I’ve taken this on to relieve him of any pressures he may be feeling at this time.

I’d like to challenge you and call you to action today. On this We Care Wednesday, if there is someone that has been on your heart and mind, will you reach out to them today? It doesn’t have to be a detailed email or a long winded phone conversation. It can just be a “thinking of you” call or “You’re in my thoughts” type of message. The point is to let someone know that you care, that you’re present, even if miles away, and available for them. Will you accept the challenge today, especially if it’s someone you haven’t spoken to in a while?

Another challenge is to consider someone that you haven’t spoken to in a while due to a difference of opinion or a conflict that arose a while back. If something caused you two to part ways, would you consider reaching out at this point? There is no guarantee of how it will turn out once you do, but the point is to put forth the effort to let someone know that you care … after that, it is up to them as to what they do with this gift that you’ve given to them. They can accept it wrapped in a beautiful bow of love, or they can turn away and choose to ignore it as the beautiful bouquet of flowers of your heart wilt. We aren’t in control of what happens or how someone will react, we are only in control of reaching out, putting forth that effort to let the other know that we’re thinking of them and that we care, regardless of the circumstances. All you can do is try … that’s all I ask.

If this is too much for you at this time, I understand. Would you, then, reach out to them through your words of prayer to our Heavenly Father? Will you whisper words of love to our Creator and ask for His hand of protection over their lives?

To my friend that is hurting at this time, I’m here sweetie. I’m available at any time if you need or want to talk, and if not, that’s okay, too. I’ll still be here whispering prayers and words of love from my heart to yours reaching across the miles that separate us … today, tomorrow … always.

Be True

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In the fallen world that we’re living in, it seems so easy to betray someone.  Without giving it a second thought, people lie, betray, deceive, and cheat on an unsuspecting soul.  Ah, but don’t think that you’ve “gotten one over” on someone because although this trusting and loving soul believed in you and didn’t see this coming, God knows and sees all.

You may think that you were slick and have gotten by this time, or you may even have the “What they don’t know won’t hurt them” type of mentality.  What I’d like you to realize is that you’re only hurting yourself for when the truth finally comes out (and believe me, it will … truth always prevails) you will have lost all of the faith and trust that this person once put into you. Not only that, but you will lose the respect they had for you as well.

Will you be able to hold your head up high then?  Will you be able to look yourself in the mirror every morning with the knowledge that you betrayed the one person that had such faith and trust in you? Will you be able to live with yourself knowing that you betrayed someone that believed in you?

This person that has been so faithful and loyal to you did not deserve to be deceived, and even the act of omission is being deceitful.  When you purposefully withhold information and are not up front with that person, you are betraying and being deceitful.

How would you feel if you were on the receiving end of this?

I’ve been mocked throughout life for being “too gullible.”  Let’s pause for a moment and realize what this very word means:

Gullible – Merriam-Webster Online, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/

Gullible – easily fooled or cheated; especially : quick to believe something that is not true. Full Definition of GULLIBLE. : easily duped or cheated

So I’m the gullible one.  I’m the one you mock and laugh at when you have purposely set out to fool me or cheat me?   Why is this viewed as a character flaw of mine, yet you’re the one smiling because you’ve easily deceived me? You’ve lied to me and you’re boasting of the fact that you’ve betrayed my trust in you? Honestly tell me, is this something to be proud of?  In my book, it’s not.  Something that I highly respect is when a person is honest with me.   When you show that you’re trustworthy, loyal, honest, and true – that is when you can brag and smile proudly – when you show me that you’re a man or woman of integrity and of good character.

Don’t laugh at me for being “gullible” or pity me for being so naive.  I don’t deserve being laughed at, mocked, or pitied for being an honest person expecting to interact with other honest people in this world.

Let’s look at the word naive for a moment, shall we:

Naive – Merriam-Webster Online, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/

naive – having or showing a lack of experience or knowledge : innocent or simple

I don’t lack experience or knowledge.  I’ve been around the block quite a few times and endured a lot of heartache and pain in my lifetime.  I’ve been betrayed more times than I care to remember, yet I still choose to see the good in people.   I am not lacking anything … I’m simply choosing to love and believe that there is good in every one that I meet.  Some will abuse it.  Some will try to use it to their advantage.  The innocent or simple girl that is so easily deceived.  Oh yes, that’s something to be proud of – that I am an honest person and expect honesty in return.  It’s not a flaw in my character that I’m so trusting.

The next time you think of betraying someone, stop and ask yourself how you would feel if someone did this to you.  Consider the hurt you’d feel if you heard someone talking about you behind your back when you trusted with all of your heart to find that the person simply wasn’t trustworthy after all.

Think before you speak, before you act, and before you betray another innocent and unsuspecting soul.   Even if they don’t ever realize what you’ve done, God sees all.

Take action on this Tuesday and right a wrong!  If you have wronged someone in ANY of the above ways mentioned above, make it right today.  Fall on your knees and beg forgiveness from God for betraying a friend, family member or loved one, and then go to that person and beg forgiveness as well.  Confess what you’ve done and vow never to knowingly and willingly lie, deceive, betray or cheat them or another person again.   Be a person of good character.  Be a respectable person of integrity.  Have good morals and values about you.  Be loyal.  Be true!

Be The Change

A Grateful Spirit

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Things are tough in the world today.  People are dealing with far more stress and anxiety than ever before.  When once we would occasionally feel overwhelmed, that feeling has become the norm in a lot of lives.  There never seems to be enough hours in the day to get it all done.  There’s work, there’s family responsibilities, children that are growing up way too fast that need our love, time, and attention, and then there are chores around the house that need to be done as well.   You may feel stretched to the limit at times.  When could you possibly fit in any time to just … be?   When would it be possible to just take a day off from life and be still?

When you throw in the fact that a lot of families are struggling financially these days, with gas prices soaring through the roof and the increase cost of groceries, the stress level shoots through the roof.  There are some families that have just faced lay offs at their jobs, while others have been unemployed for months.

With all of this whirling around you, is it even possible to have a grateful spirit?   In my opinion, yes, it is.  You see, I’ve been a struggling single mother before with very little money to pay the bills and feed my daughter.  I was going through a really bad divorce, and all of the responsibilities of work and home fell solely on my shoulders along with the care of my one year old daughter.  It was a difficult season in my life, but I did not allow myself to dwell on my situation.  Instead, I prayed to God to help me and had faith that He would.  And you know what?  He did!   It was not always easy, but with God, all things are possible.   Even when I was struggling financially, I had joy in my heart.   Why is that?  Because I had my daughter, and she was my entire world!   When everyone expected me to be sad and depressed, I was all smiles and cheerful for my baby girl.   Was I always this way in the mist of all that I was going through?   No.   I tried really hard, but I had my moments.  I tried to keep them to a minimum, though, because if I continued to dwell on those hard times, I would remain a ball of fear wrapped in anxiety and worry.   My daughter needed me to be strong and be there … and present … for her.  There is a difference in being in the same room with someone and actually being present with them.  She needed my full attention, care, and love … and I gave my all to her.  If I had spent one more second dwelling on my situation or the circumstances, it would have pulled me under.  The depression would have surely taken over, and there would have been no way that I could carry on.  Instead, I had to keep on going and remain strong for her.   I prayed and just knew that God would provide, and He did.

In the mist of all of that, I had to be intentional and purposeful with my attitude.   Sure, I could whine and complain about the situation, but would it do any good?  Would it “fix” the situation or solve any problems that would crop up?  No.  The only thing a complaining attitude would do is allow me to remain in misery.  I didn’t want that, not for myself and certainly not for my daughter, so I had to be aware of my thoughts and the words coming out of my mouth to ensure that I had a grateful spirit about me when around my daughter and others.   Some times you have to fake it til you make it, and that is okay.   However, when troubles threatened to steal my joy, all I had to do was look into the beautiful blue eyes of my baby girl … and my grateful spirit returned.

The next time you want to allow your complaining spirit to take over, stop yourself for a moment and begin to focus on all of the things that you have to be thankful for.   Allow yourself to shift your focus from the negatives to all of the positives in your life.  You have a roof over your head, food on the table, and clothes on your back.  You had a family that surrounds you with love, and that is all you truly need right there … love.   You have your health, even if there are some health issues that you’ve struggled with in the past.  You’re still here on this earth, and that means you have a purpose, your life has meaning, and you have a lot more living to do.

Will you work this week toward being more thankful and maintaining a grateful spirit?   It may not be easy in all of the circumstances that you will have to face this week, but I’m simply asking if you’ll join me in putting your best foot forward in this regard.   Any time that you find yourself wanting to focus on the bad things that are happening or wanting to wallow in self pity regarding things of the past, will you, instead, begin to turn your attention to all of the good things that you have in this life?  Will you turn your eyes upon Jesus and thank Him for the gift of another day?  Will you honor Him by using your words to praise and lift up others, instead of fault finding and tearing yourself and others down?   Will you forgive yourself of the mistakes you’ve made in the past that may be holding you back or pulling your spirit down?   Will you use your words – whether it’s your internal dialogue that you speak to yourself or words spoken out loud around others – to build up and to focus on the good and the positive?   It will take being intentional and purposeful, but you CAN do this!

For every negative that you wish to speak this week, will you, instead, replace it with a positive?   For any thing that you’d like to complain about, will you find something in your life that you are thankful for and focus on that instead?   Your words have power – and it is up to you as to if you will allow a spirit of complaining to take over or whether you’ll maintain a grateful spirit.

Choose wisely, my friend.   Your joy and happiness in life depends on it.

 

Choosing things that bring us joy!

 

 

 

Be Purposeful When Giving Thanks To God

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I have witnessed God’s hand in quite a few things recently.  One situation had one of my best friends in a panic, and rightfully so!   The news threatened to bring her world crumbling down around her feet.  Would she receive a phone call that would leave her devastated, or would she be able to sigh a big sigh of relief?   No one knew … except for God above!   We waited, and we prayed … although words failed.  What exactly CAN you say at a time like this?  I tried on several occasions to find something to offer in her time of need, and although I have been told that I’m quite long winded when I talk and write … this time, I had nothing that I felt of value that would ease her pain.  No words would be powerful enough to lift her out of this pit of despair.   Instead, I sent all of my love her way and flooded the throne room of God with prayers on her behalf.   In my inability to produce the “right” words, I simply kept reassuring her of my love and prayers so she would know that she was not alone in this.  She confided in me, and I had no words other than:

“I love you, I’m here for you, and I’m praying for you!”

Maybe that was all that truly needed to be said after all.

We waited … together, yet states away.  Oh the agony of waiting for results.  It adds more wrinkles onto our faces that we try with all of our might to keep as young as possible with all of the anti-wrinkle cream we smear on, and yet … there’s another one brought on by stress!   We hold our heads in our hands as we wait, some times taking both of our hands straight back, stroking our hair as we go, then holding our hands clasped together tightly behind our heads.  When we turn to face the mirror, we see yet another gray hair popping through.   Yes, anxiety at its finest!

Oh I know … you’re not supposed to take on someone else’s problems as your own.  They aren’t supposed to affect you.   BUT … when you love someone, you hurt when they hurt!   When they are struggling, you ARE affected because of how close you two are … it’s bound to affect even the toughest person on the face of this earth when someone they love is going through a hard time with their future unknown and unsure of what is to come, especially when it involves their health!

Then, the moment we had been waiting for.   The phone call was finally placed and my friend picked up on the other end as her words caught in her throat as she forced herself to remain brave no matter what the caller had to say concerning her results.

In that tiny moment, a fraction of a second, everything changed for her.  Completely!  Her outlook … her uncertainty … as she received the best results ever!  No cancer was found.  NO CANCER WAS FOUND!  NONE in that area, in the area of great concern … NOTHING WAS FOUND!!!!

When I received the news, I wanted to get out of my chair and dance around the room!   I can only imagine how SHE felt!

Oh happy days!! Happy days, indeed!

And then came the moment where I stopped everything I was doing and went to God in prayer.  This time, my prayer was full of praise and thanksgiving.  With a grateful heart, I thanked Him for sparing my friend, for the good news she had received, and for having His hand firmly upon her life.

Not too long after that, I sat silently wondering if she had done the same thing.  Had she taken the time to thank God?   Had she offered words of praise and appreciation for all He had done?   I’d like to believe that she did.  Only God knows for sure.

That thought needed to be explored as I firmly believe that more thanksgiving needs to be offered up to our Creator!   Thus, this blog post was born!  🙂

Have you ever taken the time to think about this, though?  Honestly?   We have no problem bombarding heaven with our requests, our wants, wishes, and desires.  We hold nothing back when we’re begging God and pleading with Him.  Yet, when He reaches down His great and mighty hand and heals the person or fixes the situation, do we take time to adequately thank him?  OR, do we sigh and say, “Well, that was close!” as we go about the rest of our day without giving this answered prayer another thought?

This is where we need to be purposeful, people.  This is where we need to take the time to thank God for how good He has been to us, because He is so very good to us all.   If we can take our prayers to God when we’re asking for this, that, or the other … why, then, can’t we take our grateful hearts to Him as we extend the biggest praise and appreciation for all that He has just done in our lives and in the lives of our family and friends?

God deserves more than just a “Whew that was close” or a “Well, thank God for that!”   He deserves sooooo much more!

Let’s be intentional with our praises … Let’s be purposeful with our thanks that we offer up to God.

Think of a situation right this minute that you’ve prayed over.  Something that may have been troubling you that you took to God in prayer.  Even if it was just a silent prayer from your heart to God’s ears … He heard it.

If God answered your prayer the way you wanted it answered, did you take the time to thank him appropriately?  God didn’t halfway do something, so don’t halfway praise him or thank him for it!

God has answered a prayer in my own life just recently, and I thank Him from the bottom of my heart.  Trouble seemed to come from every angle, even when I tried to just “Be still and know that He was God.”   The waves of hurt and pain crashed over me like the high tide rolling in at the beach lapping at the dunes threatening to spill over them, too!   I struggled … I prayed … I begged … I pleaded … and I felt like I was standing in the eye of the storm.   Then it felt just like God stepped right in the center with me and raised His powerful hand, and in an instant, the storms stopped raging around me.

My simple whisper of a prayer reached God’s ears and spoke to His heart:

Please God, please … put us back together!

And He did.  It was slowly at first, then everything started falling into place … only better this time around.   Yes, God answered prayer in His time, in His way, and with HIs divine touch on our lives.

He is worthy of our praises.  Fall down on your knees and thank Him.  Praise Him!  Lift your head up and look toward the heavens, then allow your praises and prayers of thanksgiving to now freely flow as you pour it all out and show your appreciation and gratitude for God above.

Take the time!  Be purposeful when giving thanks to God!

 

 

 

 

 

Begin

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So you made a mistake.  You messed up.   You thought you had it all together, but something went wrong along the way.  Things happen.  The important thing is to learn from your mistakes so you don’t repeat them.

Don’t be so hard on yourself.   Stop beating yourself up!

Breathe … in … and hold it … then slowly release.

Allow all of your anxieties to flow out of your lungs through your body as they make their way out of your mouth as you blow out with determination and force.   Imagine that all of the negatives are being forced out right along with it.   Oh sure, some negativity tries to remain no matter how hard you blow out.   I can imagine slippery, slimy particles holding on by little suction cups on their hands and feet.   You blow, you exhale hard, and they lose their grip!  Yes!   Success as one screams its way past another and this negative being is no more!   As you continue to breathe out, even MORE negativity leaves your body …

You hold your head back for a moment as a smile creeps across your face now, and you are ready to begin again.

 

This post was inspired by the Five Minute Friday prompt word:  Begin.  Join us at the new location for the link up next week, but for now, this is the last hoo-ray over at Lisa Jo’s site!

Choosing Gratitude

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Many months ago, I purchased a book entitled “Choosing Gratitude ~Your Journey To Joy.”   That book has sat below my coffee table in my living room just waiting for me to fling open the cover and dive in, to allow the message to soak into my being and bring about a greater awareness of how we all need to have more gratitude in our lives.

I have tried to be more intentional and purposeful in my way of thinking.  Likewise, I have tried to be careful of the words I allow to come out of my mouth.   If I begin to think negative thoughts, I try to stop myself and redirect my thinking to something more positive.  Is this always easy?  NO!  It’s not, especially if you are going through a very difficult time in your life.   When you’re struggling, that is when you need to find gratitude and joy even more so than ever before.  That is the hard part.  How can you find gratitude and joy in the mist of a storm?   Well, I’m here to tell you that as bad as it may be, it could always be worse.  Count your blessings and consider yourself so incredibly blessed because you do not own all of the problems in the world!    Yes, you may have it bad, but there is someone out there that has it worse.  I’m not trying to minimize your pain or your suffering.  I’m not trying to say that what you’re going through isn’t important because it IS!   What I’m trying to get my readers and myself to realize is that there is always something to be thankful for.

Immediately upon picking up this book and reading the Foreword, I had a new found appreciation for the author of this book.  When I purchased this book I did not know that Author Nancy Leigh DeMoss had been in a wheelchair the majority of her life.   If she can be grateful for her quadriplegia (as she states in the Foreword), what in the world is our problem?   We  have it so good, and yet we complain so much!   This lady has to have people do everything for her; help into and out of bed, getting her dressed, brushing her hair, brushing her teeth, blowing her nose, etc.  And yet, she finds beauty in ashes.  She finds something good to smile about and offer praises to God above with a grateful heart.

We are so blessed, ladies and gentlemen!  We truly are!  And what do we do with the gifts we have been given?   Life is not all doom and gloom, but yet the majority of our time is spent focusing on negative thoughts.  We vent to others, and instead of it making us feel better, we feel worse by having re-lived those moments and things that pained us right when it happened.   Now we walk around in a bad frame of mind with the corner of our mouths pulled downward in a frown with our foreheads wrinkled because we’re mad at the world.   At that moment especially, search your heart for the good – because there is always good – search your heart for something that you can be thankful for – because there is always something to be thankful for.  Look up to Heaven and thank God that as bad as it seems right now, it’s not any worse!    Thank Him for the plan He has for your life because He assures us in His word that He does not have plans to harm us but to give us hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11 is one of my favorite bible verses and is the “hope” part of our name:  Light Love Hope).

The below poem was within the first few pages of the book, even before the Foreword.  Read it and allow it to speak to you:

Gratefulnesse

Thou that has given so much to me,

Give me one thing more — a grateful heart …

… I cry, and cry again:

And in a quiet canst Thou be,

Till I a thankful heart obtain

Of thee.

Not thankful when it pleases me,

As if Thy blessings had spare days;

But such a heart, whose pulse may be

Thy praise.

~George Herbert (1593 – 1633)

There’s a beautiful flower on the front cover of her book.    She’s unable to plant a garden or even walk through a meadow filled with wildflowers.   Yet, I can imagine that she still appreciates the beauty of the flowers and the Creator of all things.   So then should we!

Will you take this journey with me?  Will you join me in being more intentional on choosing gratitude on our journey to finding joy?

Choosing Gratitude

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