We all have times when we question our worth and value.  The struggle is real due to people of the world seemingly reminding us daily how unimportant we are in the grand scheme of things.  We wonder if we are truly useful to those around us.  Fight those thoughts as you meditate on Psalm 139:14, which states: I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

When thoughts like these invade, it’s hard to get out of our head.  We can be our own worst enemies feeding these thoughts, and it’s hard to stop the vicious cycle. That is why it is so important to recognize when this starts happening and combat it with the word of God.

We wonder what has happened to using the golden rule when interacting with others?  Remember the whole, “Do unto others as you would have done unto you?”   That doesn’t seem to apply now because people would not mistreat others if this was the case.  They wouldn’t want to be mistreated themselves.

Let’s meditate on Ephesians 4:32, New American Standard Bible, which states:  Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

When you can choose to be anything in the world … choose to be kind!

Even if people don’t talk about it, there are battles being fought within.  There are things going on with us that others might not guess because we choose not to speak about them.  Or, maybe they don’t know exactly what it is and can’t quite pinpoint it, but they see us act in a different manner or handle a situation out of character than what we usually would.  We are troubled, and only God truly knows what is at the heart of the situation.  We can be useful by just praying for someone.  We don’t always have to know WHY a person is behaving this way or what is going on with them in their lives.  All we need to know by their subtle clues in their change of behavior is that we need to pray for them.  We can extend kindness, offer our prayers to Heaven on their behalf, and choose to be forgiving if they happen to say or do something in their turmoil that overflows on to us unknowingly and unintentionally.

Just tonight I read a post Hoda Kotb, of the Today Show, shared regarding her friend of 27 years, Karen.  The day Karen’s husband was diagnosed with cancer, her doctor friend suggested she buy a candle and light it.  This odd suggestion was to allow the body to go where the mind takes it, according to this doctor.  In focusing on the flame as if it was the power of the human spirit, determination, love and will, she was to harness the strength.  Further, she was instructed to watch as the wax dripped away, thinking of this as the cancer cells disappearing.

What a unique way to look at things!

I was so moved when reading that!  Karen’s husband outlived his prognosis by five years, which is amazing in itself!

I believe a person’s outlook and attitude when they learn of a diagnosis like this makes all the difference!

My friend, Mary Sue, is also proof of this.  When she learned she had breast cancer, she never skipped a beat although it certainly wasn’t the news she had hoped to receive.. She went right on with her positive attitude, just as she always had, and she conquered and persevered!  While I’m sure she had her moments, she never let us see her cry or get down about her diagnosis, surgery, and treatment.  She shaved her head prior to chemo while she poked fun and even laughed about the shape of her head.  Completing treatments, she rang the bell, and kept that smile on her face throughout the entire ordeal.  There aren’t too many people that can choose to remain positive in the face of something that could take them out of this world.

I’m happy to report my straw hat wearing, sunflower loving, Marsh Tacky riding friend, Mary Sue, is still going strong today at 77 years old.  She is an amazing woman, and I am proud to have had the chance to get to know her and love her!

If you have stayed with me during this Write 28 Day writing challenge, thank you!  Since you have been brave enough to read all of my idle ramblings, you have seen that my thoughts have been all over the place during the past 15 to 16 days.  That’s part of the fun!

Allow me to explain this madness.

With this 28 day challenge, you are given a prompt word daily (thank you, Anita!!).  It is your job to think on the word and then write whatever comes to mind regarding that “word of the day.”   You can write for five minutes, setting a timer to go off when the time is up.  Or, write until your heart is content. I have done a little of both in this challenge.  Truly, it has helped for me to have something else to focus on, especially at a time when someone close to me has gone through major surgery.  The very human side of me feared the worst leading up to my loved one having his right kidney removed.  We thank God for a successful surgery and my loved one doing so well in his recovery!  As you can imagine, this writing challenge has helped a great deal and provided an escape when I needed it the most!

Now then …

Today’s prompt word “Entrap” immediately brought thoughts of a possum that was recently found on our property while my husband and his friends were working one afternoon.  This little guy wobbled right up to them in broad daylight, taking them all by surprise.  They noticed one of his legs was injured and imagined he had been entrapped and struggled to break free from a predator’s grasp.

My daughters are both tenderhearted just as I am, and we did not want the little guy harmed in any way when we learned he made his way past the guys and into our Rosemary bush.  We gathered in front of the bush to take a peek at him.  Possums are ugly, nasty creatures from what my dad said, but they surely serve a purpose (eradicating ticks, cockroaches, mice, and rats) and deserve to live.

We kept an eye on the little guy for a while, then went inside to leave him in peace.  We don’t know what ever happened to him, as he was gone when we checked the Rosemary bush later.  My daughter was sad that her little friend left, but her heart is so big in wanting to help the little guy.  It is our hope that he survived.

How many times have we jumped to conclusions about a situation, not truly knowing the facts or what transpired?  Or, we make our own assumptions about things that couldn’t be further from the truth.  We speculate, when what we need to do is learn more about the situation and the people involved.

I’m reminded of a situation that occurred shortly after going to work in the two story brick building our office is housed inside of on a busy street corner in town.  Being new, it was my desire to make friends with others in the building.  I was friendly, smiled, and spoke when I encountered anyone in the hallways or going up and down the stairs.

One day, as I sat at my desk proofreading some legal documents, I heard a knock at the door.  Since we are a business open to the public, it alarms me any time someone knocks instead of coming right in to conduct business.  (We have an apartment complex nearby, and residents has wandered over a time or two in the past.)  I hesitantly rose from my seat.  Before I could make it around my desk, the door opened, and I saw a lady I had passed in the hallway before.  I smiled, thinking surely she was coming to have a friendly conversation.  In my mind and heart, I had desired to befriend someone in the building, and it was my hope that she was there with the same longing as I; to be friends.

Sadly, that wasn’t the case.

She motioned for me to enter the hallway so we could talk privately, so I followed her thinking at this point she must need my help for something.  As I walked, I prayed for God to equip me to help her to the best of my ability.

As I stood there in the hallway smiling at the lady, she proceeded to ask me if I flushed the toilet earlier when I used it.  I’m certain I had a confused look on my face, as I was truly dumbfounded by the question.  Yes, of course, I had flushed the toilet.  The lady never cracked a smile as she proceeded to say that there was toilet paper still in the toilet when she went in the bathroom.  Honestly, I did not know what to say at this point.   I just stared back at her, as she rendered me speechless as she interrogated me about whether I flushed the toilet or not.  I could not believe I was 49 years old and being asked about my bathroom habits as if I was a young child that didn’t know any better and hadn’t thought of flushing the toilet behind themselves.  When I could find words again, I assured her once more that I had, indeed, flushed the toilet.  The building was extremely old, and I imagine the plumbing inside of the building was just as old and may never have been replaced through the years and were likely clogged due to some type of build up. Some times even with modern plumbing, the back flow will cause remnants of paper to reappear after you’ve flushed.  This was my only guess as to what was happening with the situation.  I expressed this to her, and she stood there with this disapproving look on her face as she asked me once more if I flushed the toilet.

Now she was starting to get on my nerves.

First, she summoned me out of my office.  She not only had the nerve to ask this question about whether I flushed or not, but she asked me several more times while giving a disapproving look.

There are three bathrooms in that building, and anyone from the public can (and do) use our facilities.  Yet, I’m the one they are targeting?  Really?

I tried to brush it off and return to my legal documents.

Now, I have been told that I look younger for my age, which I appreciate.  But what gives anyone the right — and how would anyone ever have the nerve anyway — to ask another ADULT such questions?!   It wasn’t like it was HER building.  She wasn’t the landlord, just another tenant acting like the toilet police.

I truly try to give people the benefit of the doubt.  I try to see the good in people.  And I certainly try to gather facts before I go to anyone to confront them about a situation.

What ended up happening?  The lady went to the landlord about me!  The landlady and I spoke briefly about the situation. Then, the landlord placed a sign by the toilets stating the plumber indicated feminine products were clogging the toilets and to refrain from placing such items in the toilet.  I was not the one clogging the toilets in the first place, but I knew without a doubt when feminine products were mentioned that I certainly wasn’t the culprit!  The fact of the matter is I had a hysterectomy four years ago, so it clearly was NOT me!

Can you believe this woman had the nerve to approach me AGAIN a few weeks later about this same situation?

I was the new kid on the block, so surely I was the person causing the issue in her eyes.

I tried to take the high road yet again and be polite in my response to her, but I did not linger in the hallway listening to her accusations when I had work to do!

That afternoon, however, the situation really started to bother me.  Writing is often therapeutic for me, and since I could not get this out of my mind, I stopped to write a letter to this offensive lady.  After I said all that needed to be said, I placed a copy under her door and our landlord’s door.  In the letter I pointed out the fact that I had a hysterectomy, so they needed to look elsewhere for the person flushing feminine products.  However, while we were on the subject, I felt the need to point out the less than desirable condition a menstruating woman had left the bathroom in on several occasions with (***Warning:  TMI***) blood on the floor and toilet seat.  Again, this was clearly NOT ME!

I may have been on the receiving end of the “cold shoulder” after she read the letter, but I had enough at that point and welcomed the silence from her as long as she was leaving me alone now.

The landlord called the plumber out again shortly thereafter.  He probed the lines, and then suggested adding a bigger toilet which would have a more modern and forceful flush.  The landlord agreed to the installation of the newer and bigger toilet, and the plumber went to work putting it in.  Since the shape of the bathroom had been mentioned previously, that, too, has improved.  There have not been any more issues or accusations brought to MY attention either.

The moral of the story:  know the facts before approaching someone making accusations.  Give people the benefit of the doubt.  And be KIND!!

A few short years ago my husband and I traveled to Nashville, Tennessee for our anniversary.  We visited Lower Broadway, which is known as the “Honky Tonk Highway.”  You could hear music up and down “music row” from 10 a.m. to 3 a.m. the next morning.  It was fun checking out the saloons with the different variety of music luring you in.

While we were there, we also checked out the statues of famous people and historic places.  I got a kick out of the statue of Little Jimmy Dickens.  We were literally the same height which I love!

One night, we were walking in downtown Nashville going to The Ryman Auditorium, which used to house the  original Grand Ole Opry House.  As we rounded the corner, we encountered an older lady in tattered clothing wearing a hat and oversized coat with matted hair.  She saw us eyeing another statue and talking of how we were going to take turns being in the pictures since we didn’t have anything to prop our phone up with.  The “selfie” wouldn’t be sufficient since we couldn’t get ourselves and all of the statue in the camera frame.  The lady walked up to us and offered to take our picture together with the statue.  My husband was reluctant, but I thought she was kind to offer so I held out my phone as I thanked her.  She smiled softly, snapped the picture of us, and returned my phone.  We small talked for a few minutes before she started to tell me her story.  She was homeless and used to live in the nearby parking garage.  As she continued on, she spoke of the horrible living conditions now on the streets of Nashville after the city officials ran her and several other homeless people out of the parking garage.  They were not even able to use the bathroom in there any longer.  As she talked, my heart truly went out to this woman and others like her.  I imagine not too many tourists stopped to have a conversation with her like we did.  But, there was something about her blue eyes that kept me standing right there in that spot listening to her story.  She never asked for money the entire time we spoke, but I reached into my wallet and pulled out some money to give to her, wishing I had more to offer.  She sincerely thanked me for the money, which would enable her to get a hot meal, especially as the temperatures were dropping.  As we walked away, my husband seemed somewhat disturbed and a little angry by the homeless scattered along the street.  He didn’t like them begging and didn’t understand why I even gave her the time of day.  That’s when I let him know that she never, ever asked me for money.  I am the one that offered money to her, feeling as if it was the very least I could do.  While I could understand his frustration with people loitering in the streets or simply sitting outside of businesses with signs asking for money, this lady was different.  In that moment, tears welled up in my eyes thinking of her heartbreaking story.  I’m sure as a little girl she didn’t dream of one day becoming a homeless lady roaming the streets of Nashville.  Life hasn’t been kind to her, and due to circumstances beyond her control, she found herself living on the streets.  What people fail to realize is that things could change in our very own lives, and we could be financially impacted, too.  We aren’t to sit in judgement, but, instead, we are to help where we can.  What if Jesus showed up in the form of this little old lady with blue eyes that grew dim due to the way life took a downward spiral when she least expected it?!  What if He was testing us to see where our hearts truly were and if we would be the hands and feet as we are called to be?!

Her blue eyes and dingy, matted gray hair haunted me long after we parted ways just outside of the Ryman Auditorium.  She was someone’s daughter!  MOST IMPORTANTLY, SHE IS THE DAUGHTER OF THE KING OF KINGS!   Life has been cruel to her, and I’m sure as much as my heart was breaking for her, she has felt broken, betrayed, and deserted by those who are supposed to love her.  Where is her family?  Oh Lord, why haven’t they taken her in?  My thoughts trailed to this and how we truly won’t ever know what happened to land her where she was on the streets of Nashville.  It isn’t our job to know the intricate details, either.  It’s our job to show love and kindness to those we meet along our path in life.

It’s been a few years now since this adventure lead us to this gentle soul.   My heart has not forgotten her, nor the lesson she taught us.   Be kind … and be the hands and feet of Christ when the opportunity presents itself … and it will, when you least expect it.

See the following scripture:

Mark 12:30-31 speaks of loving thy neighbor; Deuteronomy 15:11 speaks of taking care of the poor; 1 John 3:17 is where you will find passages regarding clothing the needy and feeding the hungry in Isaiah 58:10, right along with being hospitable to strangers in Matthew 25:35.   We are to care for the captive, the prisoner, and the oppressed, which we are told to do so in Hebrews 13:3 and Matthew 25:36.

Last, but certainly not least, we all need to be reminded of Matthew 25:40, “WHATEVER YOU DID FOR ONE OF THE LEAST OF THESE BROTHERS AND SISTERS OF MINE, YOU DID FOR ME.”

I have never looked more forward to 7 a.m. than I did when my loved one was in the hospital after major surgery.  Two days of being in the hospital, day and night, with little sleep was wearing on the three of us.  We were looking forward to the doctor appearing in the doorway to advise whether today would be the day my loved one would be discharged.

With blurry vision, I saw a tall figure enter the room.  I sprang from the hard leather couch I attempted to sleep on, only to find it was the male nurse and not the doctor.  Trying to disguise my disappointment, we small talked about how our day was starting, then he disappeared into the hallway.

I walked over to retrieve the menu to order breakfast for the patient as we waited.  I dialed the number and gave the order to the friendly voice on the other end of the line.  Within minutes, the doctor entered with his hairnet, scrubs, and mask.  As he began speaking, he revealed today would be the day we got to leave, blow this joint, get out of jail, well, you get the idea.  We were free to go!!  Woo hoo!

Walking around the room, I gathered our belongings and packed them in the large black bag.  Then, we waited for the nurse to get the discharge papers ready.  They reminded us how busy they were and said it would be after lunch before they could discharge us.  We made the best of it by listening to music on my cell phone until they finally came back around with discharge instructions.  Shortly thereafter, we were wheeling the Burgundy Tahoe up to the circle driveway to retrieve our beloved, who was waiting in the parked wheelchair with a hospital volunteer nearby.  Pretty soon, the vehicle was packed, patient was seat belted in, and we were on our way home!  Thank you, Jesus!

On the morning of my loved one’s surgery, it seemed like anything that could go wrong did!  We were originally told to report at 9:00 a.m., then 9:15 a.m.  Driving from an hour away, you have to anticipate traffic delays, which we did.  However, another family member traveling with us had bathroom issues that delayed us further. Instead of hitting the interstate, we had to go the opposite way to find a bathroom.  Ugh!  We made it just in time but had to call the manager of Pre-Op/Recovery at the hospital to let them know we would not be arriving until 9:30 a.m.   With the surgery slated for 11:15 a.m., we were still good on the time.

Once at the hospital, we encountered one administrative staff after another policing us on the Covid restrictions in place.  I spent a solid week trying to get the Covid exemption so two members of the family could be present due to the wife of the patient having somewhat of a disability requiring my assistance in order to be present.  I sent an email to a man who helped us previously with another situation, and he circulated the email to the Vice President.  My email ended up making its way to the manager of Pre-Op and Recovery, to the doctor performing the surgery as well as to the charge nurse on the surgical floor.  The vice president agreed to allow a Covid exemption.  All medical staff were aware.  It was the administrative staff at the entrance of the hospital, information desk, and at the desk in Pre-Op/Recovery giving us trouble.  It was a fight when it did not need to be!  I had to give names of the staff who knew of the Covid exemption to get past the bulldogs.  Obviously, these people were left out of the loop on pertinent information pertaining to our unique case.  I tried to remain imperturbable through it all, but after the fourth person agrued with me over this, I admit my patience were wearing thin at that point.  It was almost as if these people took a class on being argumentative.  They must have all been straight A students for sure, if that was the case.

Waiting in the surgical lobby is stressful enough without all of this going on!  You wait to hear how the person is doing before, during and after surgery.  The medical team did a great job keeping us updated, which helped calm our nerves somewhat.

After learning he was out of surgery but having trouble waking up in recovery, I fought yet again with another of the administrative staff.  He was to be transferred to the sixth floor, and we were being directed to the floor not knowing if we would be allowed to stay with him in his room or not.  We were lectured about the Covid protocols and restrictions, even though we explained the vice president allowed an exemption for us so two people could be present under the unique circumstances.  It was truly tiring to fight this hard over something that was taken care of at a much higher level.

Once up on the sixth floor, though, we did not encounter any problems whatsoever from the nurses, the techs, etc.  All of the medical team were wonderful, and it reassured us that our loved one was in good hands.  They not once told us we couldn’t be there, didn’t lecture us and didn’t try to eject us from his room.  We were greeted with warmth and kindness.  He had to be in the hospital for two nights, and they made us feel as welcome as possible while we were his “guest” in the hospital.  This was certainly appreciated so I could focus more on caring for them between nurses making their rounds instead of arguing why I needed to be there in the first place.

One cannot rest in a hospital setting, so the first night it seemed the hands on the clock were barely moving at all.  I recall at 8 p.m. looking at the clock as he exclaimed in his medicated state, “It’s ONLY 8 p.m.?!  It’s going to be a LONG night!”  And it was …

By the second night, we were so wore out we all but passed out from exhaustion.  Stronger pain medicine was given to the patient, which allowed a good night’s sleep.  Their snoring was music to our ears, as we were so thankful their surgery was a success and they were still with us!

You come across a variety of people when working with the public.  Some you encounter are extremely pleasant, while others leave a lot to be desired.  You never know what to expect!

I recall a gentleman who called the law firm back in December on behalf of his mother.  We set up an appointment with the attorney and had the paperwork prepared prior to their arrival.  At the scheduled time, a tall gentleman entered the office to make sure he was in the right place.  Once he was certain he had the right office, he stepped out into the hallway.  Shortly thereafter, a petite elderly lady, full of elegance and grace, appeared in our doorway.  Instantly, I was struck by her well groomed appearance and red suit she wore.  We offered her a seat while giving her son the paperwork. As I waited for the paperwork be completed, I attempted to make small talk while inquiring on her age.  I was quite surprised to learn she was 97 years old and making arrangements should she require the assistance of a nursing home later in life.

Now, this lady certainly did not look her age at all.  I watched in awe as she moved around the office as she left the lobby and entered the attorney’s office.  One would expect someone of that age to require assistance getting around.  She carried a cane but rarely used it.  Even her son had to remind her later to get the cane prior to exiting our office after their appointment was complete.  She was definitely independent and still lived alone.  I was dumbfounded!

Once their appointment was coming to an end, the attorney asked her the secret to her longevity.  She replied, with a laugh, “Aggravation.”  We laughed with her but never fully understood what she meant by that comment.  Did she mean aggravation from others, or did she mean she was the one causing the aggravation?  Later, we laughed at the thought of this perfectly poised lady causing trouble.

May we ALL be blessed to enjoy 97 or maybe even 100 years of life.

Walking through the quiet house with laundry in tow I shout over my shoulder, “Alexa, play some music.”  It’s like she knows me  and announces, “Here’s a station you might like: love songs on Amazon Music.”  While it might not be the perfect music to do chores around the house, a song intrigued me as I folded the laundry.  I was convinced Adele was the vocalist. However, when I asked Alexa who the artist was singing this particular song, it was NOT Adele after all!  Instead, it was Lauren Daigle singing “You Say.”

This song lifted me up today as I was lost earlier this morning in my thoughts; consumed with worry and anxiety.  A family member is having major surgery in the morning, and I do not handle things well when a family member’s health is threatened.  Faith as small as a mustard seed is all that is required, and I have more than that.  God already knows the outcome, and no matter how much I would like to control this situation, I cannot.  God is in control, and we must trust Him.

We pray, we give it to God, and in our human nature, we take it back again and worry over it as if our anguish will change the situation.  It’s the fear of the unknown.  And yet, God has not given us a spirit of fear.  Others remind us that our worry, fear and anxiety are a sin.  But … I’m only human, and this is my beloved family member.  I want many more years on this earth with them!  I pray it will be so.

We bargain with God, state our case, and then just outright beg and plead.  God knows our heart, and He knows it’s the love we have for our family member that is the driving force.   Our love is so strong.  Now our faith needs to be just as strong.

The best way to shift my mindset from worry and fear is to begin praising God through song.  Today, I sang this song for the very first time.  It wasn’t perfect by any means, as parts are too low for me, but I sang from my heart to my God. He is worthy to be praised!

Click here for my version and sacrificial praise to God in YOU SAY.

The words of the song spoke to my heart.  This world likes to tell us we’re not good enough.  God is right there reminding us of our worth and value.  When we feel weak, as I did this morning, God reminds us of our strength, which is through Him.  When we feel like we’re falling short, God holds us close and reminds us of who we are.  We are His.

As much as I love this family member, God loves him even more.  I must lay all my worry, fear, and anxiety at His feet and trust in Him.  He has the final say.