There was a knock on the door, piercing the silent atmosphere of our office environment. She rose to open the door as she politely thanked the postman. Making her way over to my desk, my coworker presented me with a white package, smiled, and said, “Here’s a present for you.” Little did she know that the contents of this package was a very special present waiting for me to rip into.
This individual has long been known for his surprise gift-giving abilities. Out of no where, a care package would appear for my daughter and myself. At a particularly hard time in my life when I had just started going through the divorce proceedings, my friend reached across the miles and offered little gifts to bring a smile and warm my heart. He never forgot my daughter or left her out. In all of the packages that would arrive at my place of employment, there was always a little surprise inside for her, too.
Today as I opened the package, I smiled as cards fell out on my desk along with two books. One in particular said on the front, “This card has no purpose.” When you opened it, it said, “I sent it anyway.” Ah, but here’s the thing. The card may have seemed like it had no purpose whatsoever, but it clearly did as it brought a smile to my face as soon as I read it.
Another card had an actual hug inside complete with instructions that made me giggle.
And the last card said that it just wanted to brighten my day as I’ve brightened so many of theirs. Awe! What I especially loved about this heartwarming card was the bible verse on the left side.
Every time I think of you —
and I think of you often! —
I thank God for you.
1 Corinthians 1:4
The Message
This individual was sent to me many years ago, almost 20 years now. My heart is forever grateful for the genuine and true friendship that has been mine all of these years.
He has the gift of encouragement, and he reaches across the miles to turn the corners of my mouth into a wide smile.
I believe the gift of encouragement is his calling.
Last year I participated in the 31 days of writing along with a lot of other talented bloggers. It was a challenge to think of a topic that you could talk about for 31 days straight. While I completed the 31 days, and was extremely proud that I was able to stick with it, there was times when I doubted whether I had anything of real worth and value to contribute. I’ll bet you have those moments as well. Silent thoughts inside of your head trying to convince you to give up when you haven’t even really gotten started yet.
When doubt creeps in it is so easy to say, “You’re right!” while throwing in the towel. But … please don’t. You do have a lot to offer the world. We need to read your words and hear what you’re speaking straight from your heart. You do have something of worth and value to share.
Don’t let doubt keep you from joining in on this challenge in October. If you’re unsure of a topic, there are two bloggers stepping up to the plate to offer you prompt words to get the juices flowing. One is Kate, the host of Five Minute Fridays. The other is Denise, who I have come to know and love through an (in)Courage group for writers that I participated in two Winters ago. If you’d rather not write on a specific topic for 31 days, then join in on their prompt words. But, if you’re just not feeling inspired at all, just write from your heart. You cannot go wrong sharing your words that way.
Maybe you have a story inside of you screaming to get out. Or, perhaps you need to talk about the pain from your past as a form of therapy. I have used my blog for this purpose before. Sometimes when the pain is so great, you just cannot get the words to slip from your lips. You feel unable to speak, as you just do not want to talk about it out loud to any one. That’s okay. Some of the greatest forms of therapy for me has come from writing it all out. Whether it is a letter to someone that has wronged me that I just write for the sole purpose of getting it out of me and onto paper or onto the computer screen with the intent of deleting or printing out and burning the paper afterwards as a form of release … it helps to write!
If I find that I’m stewing over something that is greatly troubling me, it helps to be released from my self made prison by writing about it. If I harbor it all inside of my heart, it will fester. I know that I will feel better once I release it, and so … out it comes. This is easier for some, while it is much harder for others. I do understand this as well. Words flow once I really get started, whereas my husband, for example, struggles to express himself with words. Take however long you need. The point isn’t to rush through it. The whole purpose is to get it out of you so you’ll begin to feel better.
Maybe you’d rather not write about something so personal. If you choose not to delve into painful experiences from your past in these 31 days, that is completely understandable as well. Maybe it’s 31 days of prayers you’d rather write about to encourage someone around you. That would be AWESOME, by the way!
Just … write.
Do not let the doubt crowd out your creative thoughts that are just begging to come out.
I’d like to encourage you to accept the 31 day challenge, whether you write on a blog, in a journal, or write letters to people that have offended you or caused you grief in life (letters to later be ripped up or burned).
Join us in this challenge to write for 31 days straight beginning October 1st.
When the path leads you home, after all of these years together and you have lived with your spouse “til death do us part …” what legacy will you leave behind?
This is a sad chapter for me to write on. It is sad because this is the last chapter and last day in this series, but it is so much more than that. It goes deeper in that this chapter talks of when you get to the end of your life and you go on home to be with the Lord. It is sad for me to think of leaving my children behind. It is sad to think of me leaving my spouse or having my spouse leave me to go on home. It is sad as I sit and write this thinking of my parents who have been together close to 50 years and how they have shared everything together all of this time. One day they will be forced to walk alone in life unless the Lord calls them both home at the same time.
I think of my grandmother who lost her husband and how lonely she was when she was forced to face life alone without him after he passed away. She lived on several years after his passing, 12 years to be exact, but she loved him and missed him so. She was so incredibly lonely. While their marriage was not perfect and while they had their share of strife, they found a way to work it out and stay together. They were best friends, and they did everything together. They enjoyed retirement years together, and then one day, he fell ill all of a sudden and was rushed to the hospital by ambulance where it was later discovered by the hospital staff that he had an aneurysm. They operated, but he developed more bleeds in the brain. There wasn’t anything more the staff could do, and pretty soon a decision had to be made as to whether to discontinue the life support. This was a decision that my grandma did not want to make, and so she called in her three children for them to make the decision together. My dad did not want any part in this, and so he allowed my grandma and his brother and sister to make this decision while he prayed for a miracle. Sadly, my granddaddy passed away a short time after they took him off of life support. Through all of this, though, my grandmother did not leave my grandfather’s side. She said she had been with him all of these years, she was not going to leave him now. And so she stayed as long as she possibly could … until she was forced to leave the cold hospital room … without her life companion.
When we are fighting and fussing with each other, do we stop to think that all of our days are numbered? None of us know if we will see tomorrow. We don’t know if we’ll be one of the lucky ones that live well into our 80s like my grandmother did, or if we’ll be called home at an early age. We hope we have a long life ahead of us and that God will allow us to be here to see our children grow up, graduate, go to college, get married, and start a family of their own. We pray that God will allow us more time to be with our families, our children, our grandchildren, and to one day hopefully see our great grandchildren. But, none of us are promised the gift of another day.
Lay your foundation early on in your marriage. Commit yourselves to each other and to making it work! Giving up is not an option. Staying together no matter what comes your way should be your top priority. Love like Jesus – for we love because He first loved us!
Leave a beautiful legacy behind for your children to talk about long after you’re gone. Give them something to boast about with their children as they talk of how they witnessed the love you two shared and how you two did special things for each other. Let them be a witness to you walking hand in hand and heart to heart into your golden years together as best friends, partners in life, and life long companions. Let them be a witness to your living happily ever after.
If you have been on the fence during this 31 day series and not sure what direction you should take with your marriage, we hope that this series has been an encouragement to you to keep fighting the good fight. Hold on a little longer, a little tighter, and pray for your spouse and your marriage. Pray together, and ask God to help you in your marriage. When things look bleak, remember … all things are possible with God!
What are some things that you have held inside of your heart all of this time and just haven’t spoken to your spouse? What are some things that you’ve had on your heart that you really need to say? Won’t you take the time today to let your spouse hear those words not only from your lips but from your heart? Share them today while you still have the chance. Write it all down if you are better with the written word than speaking them verbally, but it is important that you say what you need to say now while you still have the chance!
We hope you have been encouraged through this 31 day series. It has helped me, personally, and I feel it has helped my marriage. This series came at just the right time when we were struggling. I can see God’s hand in this and how He is working miracles in my marriage. He can do this with yours as well, if you only allow Him to.
Thank you so much for joining us! May God be with you all and help strengthen your marriage and draw you closer to each other as you walk together with Him.
When troubles seem to be all around you, when the path looks impossible in your marriage … call on Jesus. All things are possible with Him!
Jesus replied, “What is impossible with men is possible with God.”
Luke 18:27
Nothing is sadder than when a couple decides to throw in the towel. When you have years invested in this marriage, yet the troubles seem to be too much … the “d” word is uttered, and there seems to be no turning back now. But, there can be! Divorce does not solve the problem. Instead, if there are children involved, it further complicates matters. Children are forced to live with continued chaos in their lives by being shuffled around from home to home for visitation. It is especially hard on children and parents that have such a deep bond together to be apart for any length of time, especially if the children are young at the time the parents call it quits.
It is so sad to me to hear of couples that are giving up the good fight. Yes, life is hard. Yes, marriage can be extremely difficult at times because you are two completely different human beings with different personalities, different unique qualities and you’re living under one roof trying to make this thing work. And it can … but it requires work on both parts! One simply cannot carry the weight of the marriage, it takes two people working together to be the best that they can be for each other. Marriage is worth it! Your children are worth it! You CAN live happily ever after!
Divorce does not solve anything. If there are issues that have come up in your marriage, if there are things from the past that are haunting you … divorce will not make all of these things go away. If you give up, nothing will be resolved. If you have pain from things in your past, running from them and divorcing your spouse will not solve it because you will not have dealt with those things that pain you greatly. Instead, you will carry these unresolved issues into your next relationship. It won’t be any better!
I have actually talked couples out of divorcing before. I have had several couples that have come to me with trouble in their marriage looking for someone to give them permission to let go of their spouse. What they get from me, instead, is to cling tighter to your spouse and to your marriage! It is worth saving! If there is any way possible, make it work! If there are children involved, especially … you and your children deserve the “happily ever after.” It doesn’t just have to be for fairy tales that you read or movies that you watch. You can have your very own happily ever after! My husband and I have seen some rough times in our marriage, but we are still holding on tighter than ever. Neither of us wants to lose the other. We do not want to give up on our family, and so we cling to each other and uphold our marriage vows. When things seem impossible for us, we know that all things are possible with God! He is our strength when we are weak. He fights for us.. He shields and protects, and He gives us the will to continue on.
With God ALL things are possible … ALL things … even the chance to live happily ever after with your spouse.
Join us tomorrow for the final day in this series … When The Path Leads You Home.
For all posts in this series thus far, click here.
The enemy would like nothing more than to destroy your marriage. Do you realize that he waits in the wings to steal, kill, and destroy? He would like nothing more than to throw his wicked head back and laugh with his forked tongue wagging as you and your spouse spiral downhill faster than the speed of light.
When troubles loom large, know that our God is bigger than any attack from the devil.
He IS! Our God is greater than any trouble the devil can throw your way. As mean, ugly, and scary as he is, our God is bigger, stronger, and has more power! When you and your spouse get into trouble in your marriage, ask God to step in and fight for you. You do not have to fight this battle alone. God is right there ready, willing, and able to step in – all you have to do is ask Him to do so.
The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
Psalm 9:9
The LORD is my light and my salvation — whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life — of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 27:1
There will be wolves in sheep’s clothing. There will be those slicked tongued individuals that will slide into your life and wreak havoc in your marriage. They will try everything to weasel in between you and your spouse. Do not allow this to happen.
Do you know why your marriage is under attack? Because nothing comes closer to God’s love for the church than the love spouses are to have for each other. Your marriage has been ordained by God above!
In times of trouble, put on the full armor of God. Ephesians 6:10-17 speaks volumes on how to do just that. As Cindi and Hugh put it in their book:
We are to put on the belt of truth, the breast plate of righteousness, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit — all that we might stand firm.
Stand and fight for your marriages, ladies and gentlemen. Do NOT let the enemy win here. Guard your hearts, your minds, your body and soul against the devil and the attacks that he launches at you. He will try to make you doubt that your spouse loves you. He will try to make you unsure of where you stand with them. He will put all kinds of thoughts into your head of things that are NOT true, yet he will be so convincing and before you know it, you will be in a fit of rage believing all of the lies that he has told you. Do not give into temptation. Just when you are trying to be strong, he will put a person before you that will tempt you and try you. Do not allow your lustful nature to take over. Do not sin against yourself, your God, or your spouse! Do what is right and do not give in to temptation or sin. Do not give into lust. Uphold your marriage vows!
Knock that little man with the pitchfork off of your shoulder. You know the one … he whispers destruction in your ear. He is the father of lies, deceit and betrayal. Do NOT fall for any of this. Do not allow yourself to be lured into believing the lies and focusing on the negatives that he forces into your mind all hours of the day and night. Do not give into temptation! Instead, do as the scriptures tell us and focus on those things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and admirable.
Protect your marriages. Honor your spouse and uphold your marriage vows. When times get tough, God can and will fight for you. Welcome Him into your marriages, allow Him to protect and shelter as only He can. Your marriage is worth fighting for, and God is just the one to do it. He can and will defeat the enemy.
Join us tomorrow for … When The Path Looks Impossible.
Have you considered having a mission in your marriage? What do people think of when you and your spouse come to mind? How is your marriage impacting the lives of others around you?
We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:10
It is true that you may be the only Jesus that some people see in their lives. There may be lost souls that do not know Jesus and have never been told how they can have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You and your spouse can tell them. Your actions can speak volumes in motivating others to want what you have and ask how to obtain it … and it’s simple really. They can see how Jesus is working in your lives, your hearts, and your marriage and want that same thing for themselves!
There are those around you that are watching you and your spouse. From friends, family members, your very own children, and people in public … your actions are being watched even if you don’t think so at that moment in time. People pick up on how you and your spouse are toward each other. They watch how you interact together, and even when you aren’t speaking with words, your body language speaks volumes.
Maybe your mission is to model how a marriage should be. Maybe you will be a role model for a young couple that sees the love between you and your spouse and wonder how you keep the fires burning after all of these years together. You just might be their inspiration to hold on a little tighter and to try a little harder in their own marriages. You truly never know the impact you can have on someone else’s life, but I can guarantee you that God brought you and your spouse together for a very special reason with having a mission in mind.
Perhaps you and your spouse are on a mission to feed the homeless or to adopt the orphaned. Maybe you and your spouse are on a mission to help women who have been abused or who are struggling to find their sense of self worth after years of being beat down. Or perhaps you are supposed to open your home to teenagers so they will have an alternative place to go besides partying, drinking, and experimenting with drugs and sexual activity. I know for us, we welcome my daughter’s teenage friends and purposely have an open door policy for them to feel free to come over to hang out so they’ll have a home away from home. We want them to know that they are always welcome here. This can be their safe haven and a place to come when everyone else is “partying.” If they don’t want to give in to peer pressure, they have other options and can remove themselves from that situation and come to our house instead.
One of the bible verses that I cling to is:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11
Believe this because it is true! God had a very special mission in mind when He brought you and your spouse together.
You probably knew this one was coming, didn’t you? With getting our relationships in shape and our spiritual walk with God, have you given any thought to remodeling the “temple?” Your body is the temple of God. We have to take care of it!
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
When you asked your spouse out on your very first date, how did you look? Did you labor over your appearance before picking her up? I bet you did! I can imagine you showering, shaving, and possibly getting your hair cut, or at the very least brushing it so that not a single hair was out of place. I imagine that you picked out your finest attire, polished your shoes, and sprayed your best smelling cologne on. You wanted to do everything within your power so that she would notice you. The same goes for your mate. I know that I made sure I looked irresistible prior to him arriving at my door.
As time goes by in relationships and marriages, we don’t take as good of care of ourselves as we once did. As we age, we find unwanted pounds gather around our waistlines. We have to work harder at resisting the temptation of sweets. We have to discipline ourselves in what we eat and drink. A basket of fries is not our friend, ladies. Can I get an Amen on that one? We have to lay off of the fast food and eat healthier foods. Likewise, men can’t guzzle the beer either or else they’ll have a nice beer gut!
We truly do have to take care of ourselves.
My husband and I have exercised together in the past. My children like to get in on this as well, especially when I throw in a Gilad workout video. Gilad will kick your butt with his moves! He used to be on Fit TV on satellite, and I recorded so many of his shows to have to work out to later. Then we went to working out with Leslie Sansone doing Walk Away The Pounds in our living room. This is something low impact that we can do together as a family. My husband and children join in, and we laugh and do the moves together. Now, though, we get exercise by walking our horses around the yard. That sounds odd, I know, but now that we are losing daylight as the days are shorter here in the mist of Fall, my daughters will still want to ride their horses. If they aren’t comfortable riding alone, we will put a lead rope on them and walk in front of the horses while our daughters are on the horse. They get to enjoy the ride and feel of the horse while we enjoy getting a little bit of exercise as we walk together around our property leading the horses. It makes a difference just doing this little bit of exercise together in the evening.
What are ways that you can incorporate exercise or eating better into your lives? Ask your spouse to join you on this part of the journey, whether you’re trying to eat healthier or if you’re looking to begin an exercise routine, why not do it together? It will make a difference, and you’re more likely to stick with it if you do it together! You have an accountability partner right their in your spouse! It can work. Give it some thought and then put it into action!
It’s important to grow together spiritually, but one simply cannot rush their spouse or try to make them into something that they aren’t. Each person has to be pursuing personal growth themselves at their own pace. My walk will not look like my husband’s walk, and that is okay. If we are both seeking to grow spiritually as individuals, we will end up meeting and coming alongside each other on our journey toward personal growth and a spiritual relationship with God.
We have not ceased to pray for you and to ask that you may … please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.
Colossians 1:9-10 NASB
My husband has just recently told me that he feels he needs to read the bible more. He feels this very strongly and is beginning to go deeper with his relationship with God. Up to this point, we have read, studied, and even prayed separately, with the exception of blessing the meal before we eat as a family. Not wishing to intrude, I have just presented that if he would like, we can start reading the bible together as well as praying together. He hesitated initially, but then he seemed to like the idea. So, we are going to begin tonight in doing just that.
In the past, we have each been involved in small groups at church. He was in a men’s small group while I was in a women’s small group. We met once a week, and it seemed to be what we needed at that season in our lives. At another point, though, when we first started going to this one church in particular, we went together to a couple’s small group. We have enjoyed both aspects involved in these small groups that we were a part of.
We have also gone out with other couples to enjoy each other’s company, but you have to be careful here. The reason I say that is because if you and this other couple are not on the same page spiritually, one could cause the other to stumble along the way. It is true in that it matters who you associate with because while you could help bring someone up, they have the potential to bring you down, too. That is something that you do not need individually or as a couple. Guard your hearts, minds, and your marriages!
Another way that we have grown together as well as individually is by reading books. My husband and I are big into “self help” type books. We enjoy reading relationship books, thus the reason we chose this particular book to write as our #write31days series for the month of October. But, we also enjoy reading books to help each of us on our personal journey toward greatness! We strive to improve and continue growing.
What are some ways that you can grow together and as individuals?
It’s wonderful when a married couple are similar in their ways. However, it can be quite difficult when your differences come out. Yet, respecting each other’s uniqueness is what is required for a happy marriage.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:14
My husband and I are a lot alike in a lot of ways. We do have some very different qualities that make us who we are as unique individuals as well. Together, we feel that we complement each other nicely.
I am the accountant of the family, and I believe in saving! My husband, on the other hand, cannot be let loose with the debit card! He jokingly says that if there is money to be spent, he’s going to spend it! That is why I guard that debit card and keep it in my possession! I am not being controlling by doing that. Instead, I am being realistic. I know that he isn’t going to be as good with money as I am, and so the card stays with me. In this way, though, we realize his weakness with spending money and my strong point in saving it! We balance each other out nicely. I’d hate to think of what it would look like if we both were burning up that debit card, so it’s a good thing that we’re different in this unique way.
There are other ways that we are different that doesn’t cause us problems but instead enhances our relationship. But, when both of us are in the same “take charge” mode, we can have problems. If we are both Type A personalities, we will lock horns at some point or another. Thankfully, we aren’t always like this. We do have our moments, though, where we are both extremely strong willed individuals that want what we want right when we want it. That can spell … conflict … if we aren’t careful. It is at times like these that one has to give a little more than the other to make it work, or one has to be a little bit more patient and forgiving than the other for us not to rub each other the wrong way. It can be a balancing act at times. You truly have to work together with the big goal in mind, and that is of living happily ever after and making the marriage work!
Two are better than one … just as it says in the bible:
Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
How can you start appreciating, respecting, and celebrating your uniqueness in your marriage?
Two are better than one because they have a good return for their work. Ecclesiastes 4:9
Can you remember the last time you and your spouse worked on a project together? A lot of times people think that because of our differences it can be really stressful sharing a project with our spouses. However, it has the potential to bring you closer together if you share the process with one another.
I was once the director of an interpretive movement/sign art group at our church. I loved this creative ministry and poured myself into it. My oldest daughter was interested in it at that time and would soak up every move I showed her. I would blast the music and allow God to speak to my heart as I praised in my own way with sign language and different movements to the words of the songs. One day I got down the gospel collection by Elvis Presley. On that CD was How Great Thou Art. I sat there feeling as if the presence of God was right there in my living room as the powerful voice of Elvis sang about how great our God truly is. Then, my husband came inside and smiled as he heard Elvis, his all time favorite. He began to watch the movements and showed an interest in what I was doing. I intended on teaching this in class so our group could minister in song one Sunday morning. There aren’t enough words in the human language to describe how it felt when my husband came alongside of me to learn the movements of this song. I was so passionate about this group, and now he was a part of it. My heart was completely touched, and as we worked on this song together, I felt closer to him. We were sharing something that meant a lot to me. When the Sunday morning came that we were to present this song, my husband was right there on stage with me, as was my oldest daughter and the rest of the group, doing every movement with ease as God was glorified. We had a lot of people compliment us on how we presented this song and on the choice of song as well. It felt wonderful working on this project together.
We have also just recently purchased an older RV. We knew going into this that it was a “fixer-upper.” We aren’t going to use it to travel the world. We are simply going to use it to travel to plantations where we can camp overnight and go trail riding with our horses. That was the main reason this RV was purchased. A lot of horse people have the horse trailers with a small sleeping quarters, but it is too cramped and much too small for my claustrophobic self. I knew that the only way I would be able to camp comfortably would be to have a RV with all of the comforts from home, including a larger bed and not feeling as if I was literally sleeping on a shelf in the horse trailer! Being that this RV is an older model, it does require some work, but we are slowing chipping away at it. My husband is discovering that when once he complained about it, he is now finding it a challenge and feels a sense of accomplishment when he narrows down a problem and is then able to fix it! Success! And we all cheer for him. He has his little cheerleading squad over here with myself and our two daughters. It hasn’t always been fun working on this RV together, though. He’s gotten upset and has lost his cool a time or two with me sitting right there, but then when he walks away from it and goes back to it later, he’s able to find and fix the problem. We’re getting this thing ready for our first trip together as this is perfect weather for trail riding! The next item of business will be replacing the brake line, and then I’ll be inside pumping the brakes. It may be only a small part of the process, but it is a project that we can work on together, and we will feel such a sense of accomplishment when we are enjoying our steaks on the grill sitting under the awning of our RV at the camp site with our horses right there with us. It will all be worth it … and more!
Think of projects that you can work on with your spouse that can deepen the bond between you. Even if it’s just working on a jig saw puzzle together, take the time.
Join us tomorrow for … Respecting Each Other’s Uniqueness.
When was the last time you took a day to play together with your spouse?
We know how it is – there are so many demands in life that you feel you just have to get this done or get that done! There’s just no time to play … and then … you feel burnt out, aggravated, and annoyed most of the time. Who catches it? Nine times out of ten, your spouse and your children will.
If you’re tired of living like this and want to enjoy life more without the guilt, then listen up and realize what the bible says on this very subject:
I know the best thing we can do is always enjoy life, because God’s gift to us is the happiness we get from our food and drink and from the work we do. Ecclesiastes 3:12-13 CEV
Be happy and enjoy eating and drinking! God decided long ago that this is what we should do. Ecclesiastes 9:7 CEV
If you were feeling guilty before about taking time away from all that needs to be done or taking time away from your work, we hope you feel better about this now after seeing right there in scriptures that God has given us permission! He WANTS us to enjoy the life He has given us. He wants us to play –as long as it is right and pure living that you’re doing, no partying hard and doing things that do not glorify God.
What does your “day to play” look like? It could be simply going to a movie together and having dinner out. Or, maybe taking a hike in the mountains or a stroll on the beach together hand in hand. For us, we enjoy horseback riding together, and so today we have set aside this day (after I finish writing this blog post) to go do just that. We will spend the day in the middle of the forest on the back of our horses — loving every minute of it!
We courage you to lose the guilt and get out there and enjoy life while you can. While you still have energy, while you’re still healthy enough to go and do … there are some people that just can’t do that now, and I am sure they are filled with regrets. Don’t be one of them. As you grow older, be able to look back on wonderful memories that you hold dear to your heart – memories of getting out there and playing with your spouse, your children, your family!
One day your life will pass before your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching and re-living all over again. Make those memories. Be intentional about time spent with those that you love.
One day God will call us home. We never know the day nor the hour that this will happen. We would not want to leave our loved ones behind with awful memories of harsh words spoken or hateful actions toward each other. No, instead, be intentional about keeping the peace, showing and sharing love always – in your words and in your actions – and making precious memories together with the ones you love.
Join us tomorrow for … Sharing A Project.
For all posts in this series thus far, click here.
I often cling to that bible verse at times when I am not sure what the next step in my life needs to be. If there is something troubling me, and I am feeling as if I don’t know what to do … I just be still and know that He is God. I have full faith and confidence that while I don’t know what to do and certainly don’t know what the future holds, God does!
Recently my husband and I were trail riding at a plantation when we met a nice lady that was out walking her grandson on her horse. He was just a little tot, and his grandma was smiling from ear to ear as she made her way around to us. She stopped to speak to us, as a lot of friendly campers do, and we ended up having a nice conversation where she encouraged us to spend more quality time together as a couple. She said that what happens is that couples are so busy parenting and doing all for the children that when the children grow up the married couple doesn’t even know each other any more because they have spent so little time together during those years. That is so sad, but it happens more often than we realize. Just as this lady encouraged us to spend more time together, we are urging you to do the same in your marriages. Be intentional about disconnecting from the world and reconnecting with each other.
As you’ve heard me mention in this series, we love trail riding and being one with nature. There is a lot to be said about the peace and tranquility you find on the back of your horse in the middle of the forest! You are surrounded by God’s beautiful creations, and you’re riding on a majestic animal. You are one with nature, and out there, you feel closer to God! I know I do! While I enjoy a good ride with my horse, there is something extra special about riding side by side with my husband on his horse. We have actually been able to get our horses lined up to where we can ride along together holding hands. We enjoy the peace and quiet all while feeling the love flowing out of one and into the other just by the mere tips of our fingers touching the other.
Another thing that we like to do is go fishing together. Even if we don’t catch a thing, we are together on this journey as we go down the river dodging fallen trees and stumps. On one of the last trips we took down the river, it started to rain … hard! We raced through the water to seek cover under a bridge until the rain passed. We just thought we would wait it out, not realizing that Mother Nature had no plans of slacking off any time soon. Instead, the rain started coming down even harder and at an angle, so we were still getting soaked in the boat under the bridge. Then we decided to just go for it and rush back to the landing to seek cover in the truck until it all blew over. Ha! Rain was coming down so hard that it was getting all in our eyes where we could barely see where we were going. Some people would have been cursing at the wind at that point, but I just let out a really loud squeal and turned my face toward the rain and laughed so hard as it beat down upon my skin. I threw my hands out to each side and felt as if I was sailing right through the storm, and there was such freedom in that moment. My husband started laughing, too, and although we looked like drowned rats when we made it back to the landing, we enjoyed this time together in the great outdoors! We purposely disconnected from work phones, personal cell phones, computers, iPads, iPods, beepers, etc., and focused on being together! And it was refreshing being with the one I love without any distractions, other than the pouring rain that caught us off guard. It felt good disconnecting from the world for a little while and reconnecting with each other.
There are times now that we will just go out to our RV and sit in it in our yard. We find our way out there by the light from a tiny flashlight, and then we sit in the dark inside the RV. Some times we will take our camping lantern with us and let it glow on the inside as we sit together and just talk. Last night was one of those RV nights, and we ended up staying out there for three hours talking by the light of the lantern. And … it felt GREAT! Nothing mattered for those three hours except HE and I in that RV right there in our yard, connecting, sorting some things out, and talking together sharing our hearts. That is priceless!
While the above with horseback riding, going on fishing trips, or camping will not be everyone’s cup of tea, find what works for you and your spouse. The point is to just disconnect from it all for a little while and focus on just being together reconnecting with your mate. Disconnecting from the world and focusing on each other will help restore a vital thing that has been missing from your marriage.
