Dear sweet baby girl,

You are very near and dear to my heart, little one.   Oh if you could only know the many times we cried out to God begging and pleading with Him to let us have another little baby.  Our hearts ached for a little bundle of joy to make our family complete.   We had little Brittney, and our hearts were filled with so much love that we were bursting at the seams and wanting to share this love with another little angel from above.   Having lost a baby and half of my chances of becoming a mother again after having a ruptured ectopic pregnancy followed by emergency surgery, I knew I was lucky to be alive although I was told I may not be able to have another baby after losing a tube when it ruptured.  I was beyond devastated, depressed and distraught at this point.  I begged God to please allow a little miracle to happen, please dear God bless me with another little one for my heart longed to cradle you in my arms, to shower you with so much love, to care for you, nurture you … oh the heart break we felt when being told that we may not be able to have another baby.   We held fast to God’s hand, shedding many tears along the way as I endured one painful procedure after another to increase my chances of conceiving.   After failed attempts, there was one procedure left that we were going to try before we folded and said okay, God … and then would begin praying for peace and acceptance of our current situation if it just was not in the cards for us to have another little baby.  Ah, but God was not finished yet, dear one.  Praise God, He was NOT finished yet.  God is still in the miracle making business, and He proved that to us, oh precious little angel from above, our gift from God Himself – you ARE our miracle!    After picking myself up off of the bathroom floor one day after a very painful procedure and just crying and calling out to God – after crying like I have never cried before, begging, and pleading with every thing in me, I can honestly say that God answered our prayer!   We were trying one more time to conceive after this procedure, and God came in riding on wings of love and answered our prayer – we were pregnant with you, sweet little miracle child!   We heard the news we had been longing for – we were having another baby!!!   Oh the joy that filled our hearts!   Then along came moments of fear as we had to be strictly monitored, precious one.  I was in and out of the doctor’s office so much being poked and prodded even more than before, but I welcomed it if it meant that I would hold my miracle baby in my arms – if it meant that you would be safe and sound, I would walk through fire, move Heaven and Earth, just to make sure that you were okay and protected.  And you know what?  You were … God wrapped His loving arms around you and shielded the pregnancy, shielded you in my womb, and I carried you nine glorious months living for the moment that I would finally hold you in my arms!   Oh when that day arrived, I did not care what I had to endure to bring you into this world, I just wanted you here with me, to look at you, to hold you, to love you, to have you next to me …

You came into this world on a sweltering September day, at 2:44 p.m. weighing in at 6 lbs. 3 oz.   I watched you in the mirror as you entered this world and was absolutely in awe of God knowing that He did this – He gave me my miracle baby!!    They placed you in my arms, and I had tears of pure joy streaming down my face.  The moment had finally arrived, and I was soaking in all of your beauty!  My miracle baby was finally here!!!  Your dad was so moved with emotion also as he watched you come into this world and take your very first breath.

Your sister was there to greet you moments after your birth.  Oh little Brittney was so proud, standing there with this huge smile on her face, just as precious as you, with her “I’m The Big Sister” shirt on.  What you should know is that Brittney also prayed for you, dear one.  Brittney actually asked me if I would give her a little sister.  I told her that we’d pray about it and ask God for this, and I believe God heard little Brittney’s prayer and answered them also!   He gave Brittney the little sister that her heart longed for.   You were an answer to many, many prayers, dear heart.

Both sets of your grandparents were there moments after your birth as well to soak in these happy times with us, to share in the miracle of your birth!

So much time has passed now, with lots of memories that we hold very near and dear to our hearts.   From all of your precious moments, being there to share all of the “firsts” with you – enjoying all of the sweet baby sounds that you’d make, taking your first step, saying “Mama” for the very first time … playing in your curly blonde hair and putting beautiful bows in your hair … oh my God wrapped you in His love and delivered you to us – there are no words to express how thankful we are for you and your sister – both miracle babies … both precious gifts from God above … both loved more than either of you can ever imagine in this lifetime or the next!  For all eternity!

Time has gone by so very fast as you’re nine years old now. Nine … it’s going way too fast!   I find myself holding on as tight as I can as you are slowly slipping from a toddler to a little blonde hair, blue eyed Princess bouncing around with those curls, oh those beautiful curls that you used to have before you made me brush them out as you tried to look more grown up … please, dear heart … precious miracle from God above, please stay little for just a little while longer … let me hold you in my arms, shower you with my love … both you and your sister are growing so fast, time has slipped away and whereas once it may have seemed like time was crawling by … now it seems like the hands of time are speeding around the clock as hours turn into days and days turn into years … and my babies are growing up …

As I’ve said to your sister many times before, and I know this won’t be the first time you’ve heard it, and you’ll probably hear it a million times more … but no matter how old you get, you will always – ALWAYS – be my baby!

I love you to the moon and stars!

Forever & Always,

~Mama~